First Come Love, Then Come Marriage
by Kei Jones
Summary: First comes love, then comes marriage...and eventually comes Jacob with the baby carriage. Look at Jacob and Leah's relationship through Sam and Emily's eyes. Expansion of The Black Wedding.
1. The Ugly Truth

The Ugly Truth

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters.**

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I'm running the usual circuits on a rare sunny day in Forks. A part of me wants to be spending this beautiful day with Emily whether it is at the beach, in her garden or maybe out shopping in Port Angeles. But instead there's something else that leads me out to the forests today. I'm mildly pleased to realize that I can have my thoughts to myself and not worry about seeing the others – seeing _you_. _Leah_. You've been on my mind more and more lately and I wish I understood why. I've not seen much of you since the Italian leeches left and can only assume that you're hiding out on the Cullens' territory to avoid me. Do you hate me _so_ much that you'd much rather put up with their stench then to even see me? No, it's not as if you're making 'friends' with them monsters as if you were Seth or even, ugh, Jacob.

I come across a huge meadow and stop to look out at it. There are wildflowers growing here and I remember you've always loved these kinds of flowers. You always told me that they were so resilient, beautiful and wild. And I told you that they were just like you. On sunny days like these we'd come out and try to find a spot just like this to enjoy the cool breeze, talk, laugh and just be close to one another. This is much too far for Emily to travel and I don't feel comfortable with her being out in the woods anyways. So moments like these are something that will always remain 'special' to me – it'll always remind me of _us._

Hearing a high yelp I stiffen and crouch down low unsure of whether there's danger or something else. Suddenly I see you breaking out through the trees and running through the meadow. Your tongue is lulled out in a wolfish smile and you're…skipping? Can wolves even skip? But you're definitely in a light-hearted mood and seem to be practically dancing. I chuckle to myself and lay down to enjoy watching you – it's just like in our younger days when you'd play around trying to get me to join you. I shake my head wondering why you're going through so much to get Seth to play with you. Seth is always eager and ready to play; it was hard controlling him most times because he's just an overgrown puppy that hadn't learned self-restraint. But you turn around facing the trees where you just came from and you lower your head and wag your tail. I'll admit it's a very enticing position that has me whimpering and wanting to join you.

I'd run around with you, Leah. We can play tag, wrestle and just run around. I'd gently nuzzle your neck or maybe knock you down roughly just to prove my dominance. I miss your scent and whimper desperately pleading for the wind to change direction and carry your scent up here. You roll over on your back exposing your soft belly and the wolf in me wants to just run up and stand over you – claim you. _Claim you? I can't do that – I have Emily_. I quickly get up pacing trying to put down the adrenaline and instinct telling me to go over there and take this opportunity. Just as I've finally arrived at a decision the one who you've been trying to coax out finally makes his appearance. I feel the hairs on my hackles rise and my lips curl back in a vicious snarl – it's not Seth; it's Jacob.

Jacob calmly walks out and carefully sniffs the air as you roll back onto your feet. You yelp and call for him; wanting him to join you. I can tell that you're impatient. Since when did you and Jacob Black become so close that you'd want to play with him? In a meadow of all places? _Like we used to do?_ He stalks out and he seems bigger than I last recall as you run up to him not in the least bit intimidated by his massive size. You run right up to his face and stop short of running into him. I watch silently waiting for him to mess up and do something to hurt you – anything wrong to get you to come back with me; to me. I'm surprised as you jump up and capture his head in your jaws; or rather _try to_. He shakes his head away from your grasp and you snap at his ear tugging on it.

A game of tag breaks out as he snaps at you and you run away. You continually coax him into chasing you and to my surprise you submit to him over and over again. You expose your soft belly, you rub against him, lick him and you whimper when he does manage to catch you (I'm starting to think _you let him catch you_). I don't know how long this childish, pointless and stupid game goes on but suddenly you phase and Jacob isn't too far behind you. Why did you both suddenly phase? Did someone else phase? Don't want anyone joining in your little wolfy games? Your laughter rings out through the meadow and I suddenly feel that light, carefree feeling again that only you can naturally bring about in me. However, the wolf in me is angered by this display – it feels as if we've missed something.

"Jacob, no don't!" You cry out in laughter and I turn my attention back to you. I hear him growl as he lunges at you but just misses and you dance out of his grasp. It isn't long before he captures you around your knees and throws you over his shoulder. What the _hell_? You're letting Jacob Black not only see you naked but _touch_ you while you're naked? Both of your laughs continue echoing throughout the meadow as Jacob twirls you around and I can tell that you're delirious with…happiness? No way in hell did that _kid_ find a way to get to you – to make you happy? He stops and he nips your hip as one of his hands boldly moves to rub your ass. Your laughing stops and I sit waiting for you to phase and punish him for getting fresh with you. Instead you push yourself up against his ass and he lowers you down so that the two of you are facing one another. I suddenly feel ill as you smile at him with your arms wrapped around his neck and his wrapped around your waist.

You smile at him once more before the two you share a kiss. I watch in horror as the kiss becomes deeper, more passionate and seems to be 'meaningful'? Jacob gently places you down so that your feet are back on the ground but your foreheads are still touching and he's holding you close. Way too close for my liking. You're whispering something to him that makes him blush and he takes your hand leading you away from the center of the meadow. You bump into his shoulder lightly and I can't help but feel that there's something more between the two of you then just an Alpha and Beta relationship.

It then hits me; it's like having a bucket of ice cold water thrown on you while asleep. Emily was talking to Rachel about how much time the two of you have been spending together. I thought nothing of it because as Alpha and Beta it's required for you two to work together. What I just thought was you two just going out to eat now seems more like a date. I recall overhearing the two of you arguing and throwing insults but now it seems more like a lovers' quarrel. The two of you are dating; you're seeing Jacob Black? Snapping out of my thoughts I desperately search around for the two of you and see a glimpse of Jacob's head just above the tall flowers underneath a tree. I edge closer just wanting to check to make sure that you've gone home and you're _not_ lying next to Jacob Black.

Much to my disappointment I see you lying on the grass next to Jacob Black. You're both _still_ naked but that doesn't seem to bother either one of you. He's propped up on his elbow smiling down at you and I watch jealously as he moves a strand of hair from your face. I understand now why the wolf inside of me wanted to join you – he knew this was going on. Jacob Black has something that _I can't _have and _never_ will have. Jacob leans down and kisses your lips lightly as his hand runs along your side. I turn and run away unable to watch anymore – him caressing you, planting light kisses on your exposed skin, you sighing under his attention, running your hands through his hair and smiling at him. Nothing will come of this – he'll imprint and he'll leave you. And when he does I'll be there to hold you and comfort you.

He just _has_ to.

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A/N: So this idea hit me after re-reading The Blackwater Wedding. So I've been inspired to do a bit of angst while I hash out what I want to do next with my other more dramatic stories. I won't lie to you ladies and gents Not Enough and Wake Up Call...I'm having a hard time giving Jacob a hard time. And I think my sudden love, again, for Jacob Black is making it hard. I mean Eclipse is just right around the corner. Well...that and I hate that Netflix has Barney. -_-; I've spent the last 3-hrs watching Barney. Why didn't anyone tell me there was an EFFIN' BARNEY MOVIE! =O That was ridiculous. *knocks over stack of books* OH NO! Not my Dumas collection. But anyway I'm always in the mood to write a bit of Sam angst and I'm trying to work on something for Emily too in this story.

So I hope you enjoyed it! And review.

Oh, btw, I really do want to thank everyone for reviewing my fics. I've gotten lax again in responding to my reviewers and it's hard for me to keep track of who I've responded too. -_-; So I'm sorry.

Oh, and after talking with chelley0207 have started a wishing campaign called the 'Keep Hope Alive 2010!' What it is...it's about all of us Blackwater fans pulling together all of our wishing powers that they change the ending of Breaking Dawn so that Jacob DOESN'T imprint! And that there's an actual battle - where Jacob and Leah DON'T die! (I've added the last part just now ^-^). But they changed the story for Angels & Demons and think they NEED to do the same for Breaking Dawn.

Speaking of sucky vampire stories. Anyone read Bree's story yet? If so PM and let me know. I'm not really interested in buying it...but want an real and honest opinion. I'm sick of B&N trying to shove it down my throat just because I've purchased all of the original series.


	2. Imprint Joy

Imprint Joy

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters.

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**Life hasn't been easy since Sam imprinted on me, but I don't regret any of it, I can't. Maybe that's why you hate me and Sam so much. With all this _love_, we're incapable of truly understanding your pain and loss. How can you claim to love Sam, when what we feel for one another is so much stronger? I just can't seem to wrap my head around it because our love is something that is stronger than any other emotion I've ever felt. I don't mean to rub it in, sound smug, self-serving or even a bitch – it's just the truth.

However, Sam comes home and he appears to be really worked up and upset. There are only a handful of things that can get Sam in this kind of mood; vampires, Jacob Black and _you_. I ask him what is wrong and he only looks at me for a second before brushing the whole matter off as silly, ridiculous, ludicrous even. And I have my answer in that moment – it's _you_. I frown for a second thinking about what you could've done now to upset _my_ poor Sammie and question him about it. I leave him no room to deny it by throwing your name out on the table; I'm sick of avoiding the giant silver wolf in the room with the cold, dark and hateful yellow eyes.

"I, I saw Leah with Jacob Black." Sam blurts out. I'm confused by his admittance because since joining Jacob's pack, the two of you are _always_ together. I push him more looking for what it is about you two that have upset him. It's not unheard of for the two of you to gang up together and attack Sam; Jacob physically and you, emotionally and psychologically. "No! They didn't – they'd didn't even see me." Sam says getting frustrated with my questioning.

Didn't see him? And in that moment, realization hits me. Sam has finally seen the two of you _together_. My brow furrows and my mouth scrunch up, as best it can, as I look at Sam with a stern gaze. Rachel had already mentioned that you and Jacob seemed to become more than just friends. Is Sam upset because you're dating Jacob? Is he worried that Jacob will imprint and hurt you? Is it that it's Jacob you're seeing? Or maybe, that you're seeing _anyone_ at all?

Sam begins to go on and on about how this won't work. How Jacob will only hurt you. That he needs to _do_ something to stop this from going too far.

'Jacob isn't right for her', he says pacing our kitchen.

'What could she _possibly_ see in him?'

'He's just a _child_.'

And I simply stand aside, letting him vent out his worries, concerns and frustrations. The more Sam rambles the more I realize that this isn't about you and Jacob Black. This is all about _you_. How can Sam still love you like this? _Our_ love is supposed to be strong, stronger than anything else. How do _you_ manage to still get to him; what is it? But, being the supportive wife that I am, I choose to ignore these feelings and tell Sam not to worry. That it's only a relationship based upon convenience. Jacob is convenient and accommodating, as are you.

I believe I find my proof as I'm walking through Wal-mart doing some shopping and I happen upon the two of you. Well, there are actually three of you which gives need for a double take. There's a small boy in your cart; his skin is pale with bronze hair upon his head. He sits in the cart looking up at you, lovingly, adoringly and you coo back at him. The child looks to be about 6 or 7 years old and I can't fathom _how_ you would know this child. You've never babysat for anyone in Forks. His bangs are swooped to the side just above his eyes, that are a rich, deep chocolate brown - and that is where it hits me. It's Bella's child!

Fear grips me at actually seeing a vampire, or rather a half-one, and feel my blood run cold. The child is beautiful and yet dangerous. I look to Jacob wondering if he's lost his mind. The vampire child cannot, just, be allowed to wander around Forks even with two shape shifters escorting him. Why _are_ there two wolves escorting him?

"No." Jacob growls out, drawing my attention. The child looks over at you with hurt eyes and an adorable pout. You had walked away to compare products on something, leaving Jacob and the _thing_ by themselves.

"Leah." He whines, his voice sounding beautiful and endearing. At the immediate calling of your name, you respond to him.

"Yes, sweetheart?" You coo.

_Sweetheart?_

Since when have you started calling a leech 'sweetheart'? I watch on stunned as the child accuses Jacob of some heinous crime, all the while pointing at Jacob. The happy couple, that you pretended to be, begins to argue about what 'E.J.' can and cannot have. As I listen to your argument is when I become aware of the entire situation – you've imprinted on the half-vampire child. You act just like Quil whenever Claire is involved, arguing with a strong fervor, resembling that of a mother bear.

Are you and Jacob really together? Or is it just an act? Why do you feel the need to pretend that you're seeing Jacob? Quil doesn't bother with such a farce? His mind is too wrapped around Claire to even consider such a thing.

"He's a spoiled brat!" Jacob snarls, taking a threatening step towards E.J. "Then just keep on giving him whatever the _fuck_ he wants. _Marry_ the bastard then, too." Jacob yells causing everyone around to freeze in surprise. Without another word, Jacob turns and storms away, leaving behind an angry and brooding Leah and a bashful E.J.

I walk up to you, the moment Jacob is out of sight, and ask if everything is alright. You look at me for a moment and I know that if 'looks could kill', I'd be dead – I'd be a pile of burnt ashes. You growl out a 'fine' before turning your attention back to E.J. He apologizes softly for making you and Jacob argue but you brush it off by ruffling his hair and planting a kiss on his chubby cheek.

_You have imprinted_.

The confirmation makes me smile brightly at you. This means that you no longer hate me and Sam for imprinting on another because you've done it now. You know how wonderful imprinting is and that there is no one else in the world that fits you better than the person before you right now. When I voice my opinions on your imprint, you freeze staring at me and look down at E.J.

If he's your imprint then he's no threat to me or anyone else. As a 'protector', you could never imprint on something that could hurt us or go against your natural instinct and purpose. I, mindlessly, chatter on, questioning your relationship and get some very interesting answers. E.J. is short for Edward Jacob, thus proving Bella's strange and unnecessary attachment to Jacob Black. He's not even a year old yet but his aging will slow down eventually. Yet, he'll be fully grown in about 7-years. He drinks blood but likes to eat human food as well; anything you cook for him becomes his immediate favorite. I also find out that E.J. is still venomous and that you've built up an immunity against vampire venom; this new shocks and awes me because you let _him_ feed off of you? As if to prove a point, E.J. latches onto your wrist and begins to drink some of your blood. It's a weird, sickening and amazing sight but it only lasts for a moment as E.J. releases you, planting a soft kiss and lick on your wrist as you heal.

I want to question you more about this 'act' that I've witnessed but I'm cut off by Jacob Black. Jacob has always been, for the most part, happy, easy-going and understanding. One look at him and I can tell he despises the fact that you allow E.J. to drink your blood. The dark and menacing look in his eyes send a shiver down my spine and I even hide behind you. I'm not sure whether Jacob bites his tongue because the two of you have already argued or if it's because I'm here; but I know he's not done discussing the matter with you.

You actually tell me good-bye and E.J. waves at me as you help him climb into the back of the Rabbit. Jacob, well, he dismisses me as if I was beneath him and closes the gap in between the two of you. I turn and walk away as he pins you against the car, what he says to you I cannot hear but what I do catch is an 'I love you'.

Jacob is such a wonderful boy but I can't understand why he's always chasing after the girl whose heart belongs to another. Jacob's 'supposed' love for you is misplaced and can never be reciprocated. It's only a matter of time before you tell him that you can't love him and will be with your imprint. I wonder if you'll leave with the Cullens. Have you forgiven me? You really didn't say much to me in the store while I was talking; in fact, it was E.J. that answered my questions. Will you come back to Sam's pack? Will Jacob become a male version of you? All these questions and more run through my head as I debate over whether or not to tell Sam about you and Jacob; or more importantly, you _and_ E.J.

The opportunity is gone as I find out later on that night that you've run away. I hear the news while over at Billy's house for a small wolf gathering. Sam seems anxious to see you and I wonder if you'll bring E.J. along since all of the other imprints are here. I sit talking to Aunt Sue when Jacob comes storming out from the woods, cursing out loud in both English and Quileute, before sitting down and glaring at Billy. The rest of his pack follows not too far behind minus Leah and her absence is all the proof we need for Jacob's foul and dark mood.

"Where's Leah?" Aunt Sue asks and Jacob answers her, but only after fighting the urge to phase.

"She's run away." Jacob admits before burying his face in his hands. At the news there are a mixture of emotions, Paul makes some smart-ass comment about it 'being about time', the cubs all seemed worried that you might not come back and even volunteer to search, your own pack look upset by the news and Sam, well Sam laughs finding the whole ordeal hilarious. Ignoring the comments, Jacob explains to Billy and Sue that you and he were arguing and then suddenly, you just, took off.

Billy immediately takes over the situation telling everyone to calm down. Jacob sits, his leg bouncing and his fists balled up so tight that his knuckles are pale. I look up surprised to hear Billy ask the question that was weighing on my mind the moment I heard the news, "Are _all_ of the Cullens still here?" Billy asks and it occurs to me that Billy knows; he _knew_ that you had imprinted on a half-vampire but didn't bother to tell anyone? Letting out a ragged breath Jacob simply nods his head 'yes'. My eyes widen at the smug satisfaction that graces Jacob's face as the entire picture becomes clear to me.

_You've left your imprint behind!

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A/N: Well I've been sitting on this story for a while and just decided to post it. I really do need to do some clean up here. I'm still working on Wake-Up Call so don't worry, the update is coming. I just need to pull a couple of ideas together and find a smooth flow to the whole thing. Right now it's just too choppy. I have learned that I seemed to do my best writing while at work but with a project in the works it's cutting into my writing time. T-T It's a two-edged sword, work seems to help keep my mind focused by then I gotta do some work. FML

But thanks for reading and reviewing. Sorry for the short A/N but I am drained today and feel as if a Bridal Expo has sapped all of the energy out of me.


	3. Donde Se Leah?

Donde Se Leah?

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters. Except for EJ, the kid is mine since SM decided that a son would only complicate the ending of BD. Pfft, and having a wolf imprint on it's mortal enemy isn't complicated? For shame, SM. For shame.**

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You're gone for two weeks; Jacob and Sam both go out in search for you but your scent has completely disappeared. Seth thinks that maybe you hitch-hiked a ride to somewhere. Where that 'somewhere' could be is what has Jacob, Sam and the Cullens all in a tizzy. Sam has seemed to have had some sort of epiphany about what your sudden departure could possibly mean. The aggression level between Jacob and Sam have hit an all time high as Sam often times comes home with cuts and bruises.

Even the Cullens are at odds with Jacob; Bella calls me and we talk about the goings-on between the three warring factions. Bella is worried because little E.J. has been crying, irritable and intolerable since you suddenly left. We try to piece together what could've brought about this strange turn of events and I update Bella on what I know. She's surprised that _we_, Sam's pack, did not know of Leah imprinting on the child that Bella was carrying. I'm surprised that the reason the baby survived is because _you_ intervened without having to give Sam any sound excuse. He accepted your lecturing and, apparently, threatened to not participate in the wedding.

But I continue on and tell Bella of Jacob's outburst in Wal-Mart which seems to only upset her. I know I've said too much when I mention Jacob caging you in and his claim that he loves you. Bella goes off accusing Jacob of interfering in her son's life and that he can't possibly love you; you're just a rebound for Jacob and that this is all a way of getting back at Edward because Bella loved him more.

I'm not sure what else she says because she hangs up and I feel an unsettling kick in my gut. I tell Sam about my conversation with Bella and he looks at me in disbelief. He stares at me for so long that I'm not even sure if he's awake or asleep.

"Sam?" I call lightly touching his arm.

"I'll warn Jacob that Bella is angry but I really don't understand why." Sam says absently, his eyes unfocused. "Leah couldn't have imprinted; let alone on Bella's child." He comments turning around and preparing to head out the door. "Imprinting is about making stronger wolves. If she could have babies then I would've imprinted on her – or not at all." I gasp in shock at his words. Without a look back, Sam walks out the door and leaves me behind watching him disappear into the tree line with tears streaming down my face. I know that he didn't_ mean_ to say it out loud; those were his own internal thoughts but it still hurts.

_I've already let my Sammie down. I thought it didn't bother him – what happened._

Sam's POV

The moment Emily tells me the news I immediately brush it off as nothing more than some silly rumor. I've known of your strange attachment to the _spawn_ of Isabella Cullen but that's only because you can't have any of your own – not anymore. You're always nice and patient with Claire; you've always loved children. Why should a half-vampire be any different when your maternal instincts are involved?

I inform Jacob of Bella's impending rage and he reluctantly thanks me for the information. I try to search his mind for any reason for _why_ Bella would be angry with him – but come up with nothing. He's gotten good at hiding his thoughts from me. He snarls at me, feeling me poking around in his head and my punishment is an image of you smiling up, lovingly and adoringly at me – but it's really not me you're looking at with those soft hazel eyes, its Jacob.

I'm not sure what transpires between Jacob and the _former_ love of his life, Bella, but there is obviously a strain on their relationship. Jacob stays in La Push leaving the patrolling of the Cullen territory to your brother, Embry and Quil. Jacob only remains sitting on his front porch, looking down the street, almost as if he's expecting you to come back to him at any moment. I post myself across the street and do the same; wait for you to come back, secretly, hoping and praying that you're coming back to _me_.

You do return, eventually, after being gone for 3-weeks. There is a joyful howl announcing your arrival that startles me out of my nap. I have a crick in my neck from leaning up against the tree, my tree, which has been my post for the last week. I stand up and walk out to the road preparing to head towards the Black's backyard. I stop short catching a glimpse of someone out of the corner of my eye. Looking down the street I see _you_ coming, casually walking down the street with a smile on your beautiful face and a bit of pep in your step. You're wearing a light brown strapless dress, heels, and a huge sombrero hanging behind your head and a go-bag strapped across your chest.

You walk up the street casually; as if you've _not_ been missing for weeks but rather went to the mall for a short shopping trip. I feel my heart racing as you come closer and I steal a quick glance over towards the Black home. Jacob is standing on the porch, he's watching for you to come up the street and there's some kind of worried, confusion on his face.

"Hey Sam," You greet me once we're only a few feet apart. I turn giving you my full attention and I'm struck at how light and…free you look. Your eyes no longer hold that glint of resentment and disgust for me. For a moment, I feel as if you've forgiven me for hurting you; that you've come to make amends with me. In the second it takes for me to return the smile and greeting you've already turned and moved on.

"Hola mi amigo. Como estas?" You say to Jacob with a bit of laughter to your greeting.

"Mexico? You _went_ to Mexico?" Jacob growls out as he storms off the porch.

"Si, si." You answer nodding your head. Jacob stops a few feet in front of you and only glares down at you. I can only guess that your smile only gets bigger as his frown gets deeper. "Tijuana, in fact." You add taking your bag off and placing it on the ground beside you.

"Lee," Jacob growls out as you bend down and begin rummaging through your bag.

"Jake," You growl right back at him as you stand up with a bottle in your hand. "Look, next time you come along." You state simply, removing your hat and placing it on Jacob's head.

_Next time?_

"Next time?" Jacob asks. I watch in disgust, hurt and envy as you nod your head at his question, wrap your arms around his neck and kiss _him_. I turn away with a growl as _you_ allow Jacob to deepen the kiss. I can't help but find myself wishing that Emily had been right; that you _had_ imprinted on the half-vampire child because than that way I wouldn't be forced to see you in the arms of Jacob Black.

I hear you squeak a little and turn around in curiosity to see Jacob Black carry you bridal style up his front porch and into his house. I have an imprint, a wife, and despite all of that I can't find it in myself to just be _happy_ for you and Jacob. Maybe it's the fact that it's _Jacob_ that's eating me up inside. Or it could just be the idea of _you_ with someone else. Either way I head back to home promising to put an end to this _foolishness_ before it gets too far out of hand.

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A/N: So I'm sitting here at work, responding back to some PMs, basking in the glow of my 150 tweets and 12 new followers in one night (last night) and I decide to clean out my mailbox. Wouldn't you know it I had an update sitting here that I'd completely forgotten about. So I figured that I'd just proof it real quick and go ahead and post it.

Hope you all liked it and I gotta admit these short less than 2k chapters are like a breath of fresh air when compared to Wake-up Call's 5-7k plus chapters.

Hehehe…that's right, cry Emily cry! Oh, woe is you. Sam said and did something that hurt you? Yea…well you deserve it YOU WHORE! Hmph, you're not even the fun-loving kind of whore that I wouldn't mind hanging out with on a Friday night.

And has _anyone_ seen Chaske's newest do? Please, please, _please_ look at it and PM me. I seriously want to talk about it with someone who actually _cares_ about the wolves, their looks and image. T-T Why did he do it? _Who_ convinced him to do it? I SO gonna kick their ass.


	4. Secrets and Determination

Secrets and Determination

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own any of the Twilight characters. And BECAUSE of this fact, I've taken up into torturing at least TWO of my least favorite characters in the book. HATE YOU, SAM! The only thing that saves you in my eyes is that hottie Chaske (although that haircut is really ruining my fantasies). HATE YOU, EMILY! YOU MUFFIN-PUSHING WHORE! I've got nothing against Tinsel…except that she's **_**always**_** posing in her pics. Uh…vain much?**

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I hear the news of your return and immediately rush over to your house to see you, to talk to you, to ask you 'what the _hell_ you think you were doing'. I'm only mildly surprised to find out that you're not at home; Seth tells me as he's sitting on the couch with Quil and Embry all watching a movie. I chuckle lightly because you are more than likely over at the Cullens to see your imprint, E.J. I clarify my thoughts with Seth and I'm confused by the strange looks I'm receiving all around.

"Over at the Cullens?" Seth asks as if it was the dumbest question in the world.

"Yes, Leah's over at the Cullens." I state this time rather than ask. I feel a slight air of superiority over the boys because I know something that they don't.

"I don't think Lee has left Jake's room since she got back." Quil states with a smug and proud grin. Embry chuckles and the two of them high-five one another as Seth pales and sticks out his tongue in disgust as if shaking a nasty image from his head.

"You're wrong." I state to the three boys sitting on the couch and I find myself losing my patience and temper with them. "Leah has an _imprint_ and she's with _him_ right now."

"Who told you that?" Embry asks narrowing his eyes at me suspiciously. I become aware that the other two are also eyeing me carefully.

"Leah's _imprint_," I sneer crossing my arms, "told me. I saw her, E.J. and Jacob at the store some weeks back." I state and they all exchange looks with one another.

"Well you were _sadly_ mistaken, Emily." I turn around and I see you standing in the doorway with a smug Jacob Black behind you. My eyes widen as I slowly back up and put some distance between us. The look in your eyes is sheer murder, anger and a warning flare. I'm not really sure what it is I'm afraid of but maybe it's because I've, literally, walked into another wolf's den and my own pack isn't around to protect me.

"Lee-Leah," I greet nervously nodding my head at you. A deep growl escapes your lips as you stand unmoving with your arms crossed tightly in front of your chest.

"Listen to _me_ and listen to me _good_, Emily." You snarl at me, moving forward as I continue to back up. "You _will_ forget that imprint bullshit you were just spouting a few moments ago." You demand and I suddenly realize that I've backed myself up against the wall. I stare at you in fear and confusion. I must shake my head and open my mouth preparing to say something but you cut me off. "I'm _not_ fucking around here, Emily. I'm _no longer_ imprinted on the child you saw that day. And I'd _like_ to keep this under wraps, _got it_?" You demand and I dumbly nod my head agreeing.

"Lay off some, Lee." Jacob calls walking up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you back into his chest. I breathe a small sigh of relief the moment the intimidation, danger and heat is gone. "You're about to make her piss on the floor." Jacob adds before he starts kissing and nuzzling your neck.

Seth whines and complains about the two of you giving it a rest and being respectful of siblings' presence when they get 'like that'. Quil and Embry are unfazed and turn their attention back to the TV, both seeming content now that the whole pack is back together.

I head towards the door feeling out of place in this small group of wolves who once upon a time used to have nothing but kind word for me, wanted me to acknowledge their presence and bake them muffins. I realize now that you've taken that place and have, inadvertently, received a promotion judging by the way Jacob holds you so tightly. I look back with a small frown as Jacob sits down in a recliner and pulls you into his lap. The warm and content smile on his face is heartwarming but I cannot help but worry about the imprint that you've broken.

"Why?" I surprise myself with the question as you and your pack all look back at me.

"Why…what?" Seth asks prompting me to continue and clarify.

"Why did you break it?" I ask after a few moments of awkward silence and building up my confidence. I know the moment the question passes my lips I regret the answer that will come.

"Because I want to be able to _choose_ who I want to be with. Anything worth having is worth fighting for." You answer simply with a small smile on your face. You're not looking at Jacob but I know you're referring to him. "I've lost so much because of this wolf business and I _refuse_ to lose anymore. I want to learn how to heal myself instead of letting some magic wheel of 'imprint roulette' decide for me. I don't want the others to know because I don't _want_ to be lectured about how I've gone against fate. I _especially_ don't want to go into details about _how_ I accomplished it." You continue on closing your eyes for a moment. "_This_ is my choice and I'm willing to live with it."

I nod my head as if the explanation is all that I was looking for. Turning I say my good byes and walk out the door, my head filled with thoughts of 'what-ifs' and more. If Sam found out the truth that _you_ broke your imprint for Jacob what would he do? What would he think of the whole situation? Would he lecture you, only to turn around and try to break the imprint himself? I shiver wrapping my arms tightly around my body to fight off the cold chill that is surrounding me. I know that Sam still loves you even if you have moved on with another. I decide to keep the secret to myself in fear of losing the one fate had decided to hand to me.

As much as I'd love to have you return back to your imprint; I find myself torn between the two options. If you were to remain with the Cullens, you'd eventually leave with them and I'd probably never see you again and nor would Sam. As much as I know you'd much prefer to never see either one of us again, it doesn't change the fact that we _both_ still want you there. I guess it's selfish of me either way; whether you stay with your imprint and prove that it _is_ love or break your imprint and still allow Sam the option to see you.

As I walk into our home I see Sam sitting on the couch with some of the pack all watching a movie. I'm greeted warmly and I can't help but notice the similarities and differences between our two packs. Or maybe the only difference lies in the fact that we're not all just one big, happy family anymore? I kiss Sam on the cheek before heading into the kitchen where he follows me. I prepare to start cooking lunch for a pack of hungry wolves and I feel him watching my every move closely. He's observing me to see if everything is alright as I am sure that he can smell your scent on me.

"She's fine, Sam." I answer with a sigh. I hear him shift awkwardly from one foot to the other behind me and clear his throat.

"Was – was Jacob there?" Sam asks and I feel a part of my heart break at the poorly executed nonchalance in his voice.

"Yes, he and the rest of the pack were all there." I answer deciding to ease his tension and concern. That answer seems to satisfy him as he walks up and kisses my scarred face, peppering it with sweet, small pecks.

* * *

**Sam's POV**

The first packs meeting is held since Leah's return and I sit with Paul beside me awaiting your arrival. Jacob is sitting not too far off to the right, low annoyed growls rumbling from his throat as each second you're _not_ here ticks by. Seth had stopped by letting us know that Leah was being held up at the Cullens but that she was on her way. Jacob refused to start the meeting without her and the only reason he is _still_ sitting here is because Billy told him to sit down and be patient.

_Patience definitely isn't one of his virtues_.

Eventually you show up and you smile sheepishly offering up your apologies to the Council as you take your seat next to Jacob. He must give you a look because you reach over and pat his hand. It frustrates me when I see him take hold of your hand and intertwine your fingers. I'm not really sure what the meeting is about as all I can focus on is how _his_ thumb casually, slowly and meticulously strokes your thigh and you draw meaningless patterns on the back of his hand.

"The Cullens believe there will be some of the Volturri in the area soon." You speak up drawing my attention away from your busy hands and up to your face. The Council grows silent looking at you and Jacob asks if this bit of information is what kept you for so long. You nod your head in confirmation and begin going into details about what was seen.

"What are they after _this_ time?" Paul asks with a deep growl.

"It seems that they are interested in checking up on the child." You answer matter-of-factly and I can't help but notice that there isn't any sign of complete fear in your eyes; thus proving that the rumors of you imprinting on the spawn were just that – rumors.

"Will we need to get involved?" Old Quil asks and you look to Jacob for the answer.

"I'm guessing that since my pack has pulled back on patrolling the Cullen territory it's easier for Alice to see the future." Jacob explains with a shrug. I frown deeply because _that's_ not an answer to whether or not he's going to be involved. I _refuse_ to put my pack in unnecessary danger, however, if he insists in helping his Bella Cullen then I'll have no choice. I _won't_ stand aside and let _you_ get hurt because of this pup.

"I think we should move our territory elsewhere and keep a closer eye on Fork and Port Angeles for the time being." You offer up. "Alice doesn't think that _they'll_ cause trouble but…there maybe others that will follow soon after." This extra information seems to be the real matter of concern.

We all listen as you tell us that Alice has seen a few other covens discussing coming up here to see not only the child but the wolves as well. They keep changing their minds about when they will come but they are dead-set on coming up here to our rainy peninsula. It is agreed unanimously that we'll train and patrol in order to be prepared for this second wave of vampires, opting to leave the Italian leeches alone.

In the meantime, you and Jacob start to get more serious. The entire rez is abuzz with the idea that you two are together. It eats me up inside because once upon a time it was _us_ that were the greatest couple; but now it's all everyone at the trade store, tribal gatherings and even at the beach can seem to talk about.

Everyone is so happy that you've moved on from _me_; that you've found real love and happiness with Jacob Black. It hurts to hear people talk like this, especially in _my _presence, because it makes it sound as if I _never_ really loved you to begin with. I want to find you and let you know that I've _always_ loved you and that I always will; that you were _my first_ and _only_ choice to have as my wife, to stand by my side and be the mother of my children.

Your _relationship_ with Jacob Black seems to grow stronger and stronger with each passing day. Before where it looked as if you were hesitant or reluctant to show your affection towards Jacob Black out in public is soon forgotten and I'm forced to watch you walk down the street hand-in-hand with him. When you participate in the traditional tribal dances it's _him_ that you stand by after it is over and what was once the sense of pride that belonged to _me_ as people praise you for your beautiful dancing is now being bestowed upon _him_. _He_ is the one that gets to hold you close, whisper in your ear, make you giggle and even _blush_.

I've finally had enough of this, _this_ relationship when I stop by Billy's house and happen to see Jacob focused on something in his hands. He doesn't sense or at least acknowledge my presence when I walk into the house and find him sitting at the kitchen table with his back to me. As I move around him to see what he is working on is when I see it and, immediately, recognize what it is he's working on.

_A promise bracelet_?

I stand watching as he finishes up his work and smiles proudly down at it. I want to phase and rip it to shreds; I want to phase and rip _him_ to shreds. Turning I storm out of the house and head directly for your house. I don't bother knocking as I open the door it bangs loudly against the wall. I'm sure it leaves a dent or maybe a hole in the wall but I don't care.

You and Seth both come running into the kitchen to see what is going on and you both freeze seeing me standing there. For a moment, my anger is gone as I stand looking at the two of you standing side-by-side. It reminds me of the day I came back to the rez after returning to my human form. I had snuck into my room and grabbed some pants but right afterwards I ran to your house. You were the first person that I had wanted to see; I wanted you to hold me, run your fingers through my hair and speak softly to me telling me that everything was going to be okay. You both have that same look upon your face as if you're not sure whether or not I'm a danger or a threat. You'll never know that it was _that_ hesitation that made me realize that I shouldn't be around you – that maybe I _was_ a monster.

"Sam, what's going on?" Seth asks speaking up as both of your bodies slowly relax. My eyes dart from you to Seth and back to you again. "Sam?" Seth calls again.

"You can't do _this_, Lee-Lee." I blurt out finding myself able to move again as the anger fuels my drive.

"Do what?" You ask and look to Seth for clarification. Seth only shrugs his shoulders and I continue moving towards you.

"Be in a relationship with Jacob Black." I growl out quickly taking your hands into mine. You quickly snatch your hands away before I even I have a chance to savor and enjoy the warmth and long-missed contact between us.

"You've got some nerve, Samuel Uley." You spit wiping your hands on your shirt as if I was dirty and carrying some disease. I hear a soft 'uh-oh' come from Seth but I keep my eyes focused on you. I want you to look into my eyes and see the love and concern I still have for you.

"You _can't_ do this, Lee-Lee," I growl out.

"_Stop_ calling me, Lee-Lee." You growl at me as your eyes darken. "_You_ left _me_. _You_ chose Emily over _me_. _You've_ made your decision to live a life separate from mine. Just because you _imprinted_," You growl out as you stand tall and glare up at me. "Doesn't give you the right to just come _barging_ into my home as if _you_ owned it and begin telling _me_ who I can and _cannot_ be with."

"I DIDN'T HAVE A CHOICE, LEE-LEE!" I yell back at you. My chest puffs out as I breathe heavily trying to control the wolf inside of me. He's angry and wants to be unleashed so he can lash out and destroy. But I keep it in check for _you_.

"There's _always_ a choice, my dear Sammie." You state with a smug grin on your face. The flash of confidence and knowing in your eyes deflates my anger. "Nothing is set in stone except for our own inevitable death." You state. "I've fought to have this relationship with Jake and I'm _not_ going to let _you_ or anyone else come in and try to take it from me."

I feel a piece of my heart break as I see the determination in your eyes. You've invested so much into this _thing_ with Jacob Black; you've got both of your teeth and claws dug in and you're not budging. Your eyes sparkle when you mention _his_ name and I wonder did I ever have the same effect on you.

"Lee-Lee…he'll, he'll imprint and will leave you broken." I whisper out trying to use your hurt and dark past against you. Its low I know but I need you to see the truth.

"If Jacob no longer wants me anymore than, so be it." You answer calmly and I look down at you in awe. "I'll just get up and move on to find an even stronger love than what I feel for Jacob."

_Stronger love?_

"I'm not going to live my life in fear that someone is going to up and leave me some day, Sam." You state shaking your head. "And I _don't_ want nor need you coming around trying to remind me of my past." There is a low hiss in your speech and I step back from you.

"I think it's time you left, Sam." Seth growls out taking a forceful step forward. I answer him back with one of my own but it is cut short as I turn to hear an even angrier and threatening growl behind me.

"You heard him, Sam." Jacob Black growls out standing in the doorframe. Jacob Black has never intimidated me as I had 4-years over him but at the moment he frightened me. His massive frame, blocking the path that I came through, his head hung low, his dark eyes locked onto me, his muscle tense and ready to lunge at me. With a sigh and a growl I turn and walk away from you, leaving you to Jacob Black; a pup that can only hurt you.

* * *

A/N: So here goes the next update. This story doesn't seem to require to much emotional involvement as does Wake-up Call and even Decision. I'm going to try and get some other stories finished tomorrow since I'm hitting the gym tonight. I'm really afraid that the gym is going to hit me back. T-T Gawd, I hope there's no resistance training today. I did that shit Thursday.

So last week…my armpits hurt. Yea, yea I know. O_o? WTF is she talking? I had the _exact_ same reaction when I went to raise my arms for a well-deserved stretch and like the muscles there were tight. I have pretty good high tolerance for pain or sometimes I'm just too lazy to whine about it. But there was tight, prickling sensation which has then spread to my…what are those? Are there muscles going to your boobs? Can't really call them pectorals…or can I? But it's like my muscles are straining to hold Rachel and Bianca up…well more so Bianca than Rachel. *glares down at left boob* Damn you bitch! Always causing trouble.

But make my day worthwhile and help the twins calm down by leaving me a review. Oh and if you haven't done so yet go check out Wake-up Call. Yea, I'm plugging my own story but with these 13 ¼" guns *flexes arms* I'm _telling_ you to go check it out. What's like 15 chapters? That's some Jake and Leah goodness to be reading on. Plus, PLUS there's a hot alpha in there too with _gorgeous_ gray eyes. ^-^ Hehehee. So now click that button right here at the bottom and just let your fingers do the work. Tell me what you think; whether you like it, love it, hate it – think I'm a _horrible _writer and I just need to give the art up completely or DIE! Or tell me you completely disagree with that earlier statement and want to say, "Kei! Don't you _ever_ think that way about your writing." Stroke this Kat's ego a bit. ^-^

Thanks!


	5. Graduation and Bracelets

Graduation and Bracelets

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters and for the last year I can't understand WHY people don't see the AWESOMENESS that is Blackwater. ARE YOU BLIND? You must be…and for that I am sorry. Sorry that you're going to live a pitiful and poor existence believing love is about being weak, obedient and subservient to your partner…or rather MASTER! (says the girl who just text her ex with the simple word 'bitch'. Why asked why? Response back: 'U r mine'.) **

* * *

The school year breezes by and you are _still_ with Jacob Black. Most of your pack has now graduated from high school and I sit beside you during the graduation because Jared is also now done with school. You sit on the bleacher next to me, your eyes shining brightly and proudly as you watch Jacob, Quil and Embry's every move. Your body heat is so warm and inviting. You're wearing some skinny black jeans that hug your legs and hips along with a dark red blouse with a low V-neck cut. It's not easy but I fight the urge to _not_ look down your shirt at your full breasts.

The fact that you reek of _Jacob_ doesn't help with my comfort level either. Your hair is growing out and it hangs down to your shoulder blades but it's not enough to cover the hickies and bite marks on your neck. The thought of that _pup_ marking you as his sickens and angers me that I've had to excuse myself doing the graduation to get outside and calm down.

It frustrates me that you've gotten dressed up like this just for _him_. That it'll be _his_ hands running up, down and around your hips, thighs and ass. That you'll press your full tits into _his_ chest and that he'll probably latch onto them –

BANG!

"Whoa, whoa, whoa there, man." Paul calls out after I've punched and dented a locker in the hallway. "I know our lockers were always crap but it's the best this school will ever have." Paul adds and I growl, opening the door and popping the dent back out.

Slamming the locker shut, I continue my fast pacing up and down the halls. Paul leans up against the wall letting me vent my frustrations to the cool air around us. My pacing begins to slow as I hear them start calling out names of this year's graduates. I take a few deep breathes wanting to be a sign of support for my pack and prepare myself to put up with _your_ act.

"Lee-Lee's looking pretty hot tonight, huh?" Paul asks with an approving smirk and my resolve is shattered.

"She's wearing his _promise_ bracelet too." I throw out rolling my eyes. Jacob _did_ give you the bracelet that I saw him working on some months back. It's an intricate and complicated pattern of red, black and yellow. He wove the strings around a lackey band so that even if you phase it'll stretch along with your changing form. You _never_ have to take it off and you don't.

"When _isn't_ she wearing that bracelet?" Paul asks thoughtfully looking up at the ceiling.

My eyes cut towards Paul and I begin to question _why_ I made him my beta. Sure we've been friends for a long time but…sometimes.

"You know she's made him one too, right?" I feel my heart drop into the pit of my stomach which is full of freezing water instead of stomach acid. I stand still looking down at the brown and beige checker patterned floor beneath me.

_She made him one too?_

I had made you a promise bracelet my senior in high school and presented it to you. You were so excited and happy with the small token of my heart; but you _never_ made the same gesture towards me. I can't help but wonder what this could all mean?

"It means she's moved on with her life." Paul states as if answering my thought. "She's no longer hung up over you, Emily and this whole imprinting thing." I look up at Paul with a deep frown. "This is what you wanted, right? For Lee-Lee to let go of the pain and _not_ hate you?" I dumbly nod my head because it is a _half_-truth. I wanted you to let go of the pain, forgive me, _not_ hate me but still…want me. But now you want Jacob Black. "Let's go before they call out Jared's name." Paul says patting my back and leads me back into the auditorium; back to my seat next to _you_.

The graduation blows by as the graduating class isn't very big and I'm glad that I didn't miss Jared's name being called; I missed _his_, fortunately. There's a graduation party being held in the tribal lodge and the whole rez is invited. The parents and young adults only stick around for a little bit before leaving it to the teens and a few _brave_ chaperones. Emily and I agree to stick around; Emily always feels better when she's being helpful and your lingering scent is what keeps me close.

I wonder around the hall rolling my eyes at the couples making out and the loners that are drinking and/or smoking. I don't break them up because I, rather _we_, did the same thing when we were their age. On this night years ago I felt certain that we'd already be married and have a baby on the way. You talked about going to college and I was alright with that but really didn't believe that you'd stay away from the rez for too long. Tijuana has proven me wrong. I head outside and find most of the pack hanging out since it's so warm inside the lodge. I hear your laughter around the corner and slowly make my way over to see you laughing and talking with Quil, Embry and Seth. Somehow you all have managed to claim the entire back deck as your own; people move quickly around you all not wanting to linger for too long.

Quil must make a comment about your cleavage because Embry looks appreciatively down your blouse while Seth roughly pushes him calling him a 'pervert'. You only laugh and shake your head at your pack's antics.

"There you are." Jacob says walking out onto the deck looking you up and down. I feel my anger growing as I happen to notice the bracelet that Paul had mentioned earlier.

"You make it sound like _we've_ been avoiding you." You state back smugly as the rest of your pack parts making room for their alpha.

"Actually _I've_ been trying to keep you two apart for at least a _few_ hours." Seth admits raising his hand with a deep frown. There are some chuckles as Seth's hair is ruffled and he growls at all of them.

"Since the mission was a bust, I'm going to go talk to some of the lonely ladies inside." Seth says with a smirk, tucking his hands in pockets and walking back inside.

"Guess I'll go and watch him make a fool of himself." Quil says laughing as he pushes off from the rail.

"You might be surprised by Seth's pick-up lines." You state proudly.

"This I've _gotta_ see." Embry says and he moves off following after Seth with Quil. I remain in my position down-wind of you and _him_. My chest clenches as he stands taking in your body and feel the urge to just beat him within an inch of his life and even further. You smirk at him before puckering your lips and he walks in and covers your lips with his. He settles in between your legs as the kiss deepens.

I feel my nails biting into the skin of my palms as I look away in disgust when you both moan. I feel my nose crinkle as I look back up and you're now sitting on the rail of the deck, resting your forehead against _his_ while you're both holding each other.

"You're finally done with school." You state in between kisses. "Guess this means you're smarter than I thought." Jacob laughs at your jab.

"You'd be surprise at my intelligence." Jacob states confidently.

"Well I _do_ find a guy that is intellectually stimulating to be _very_ sexy." You tell him, your voice sounding very breathy and sexy.

"Oh really?" Jacob asks raising an eyebrow as your hands run down his chest to his stomach to his waist and back up again.

"Really, say something smart, baby."

"2+2 = 5," Jacob whispers in what I can only assume is meant to be a sexy voice. Your coy smile falls as you stare up at him blankly. "In 1992 Columbus sailed the ocean blue." He looks down at you proudly as you let out a long, tired and heavy sigh.

"Well…at least you're pretty." You state comfortingly as you pat his shoulder with a small smile.

"Pretty?" Jacob questions. "Please, I'm handsome, rugged, charming, suave, sexy, debonair, a walking _Adonis_," He gloats.

"Oh so synonyms you learned?" You ask as your smile grows as he only shrugs.

"Besides it also helps that I'm really, _really_ good with my hands." Jacob growls out pulling you closer as he begins kissing your neck and his hands move up underneath your shirt. I watch stunned as you arch your back into Jacob's body and gasp before letting out a sultry and seductive moan.

"_That_ is a _big_ plus." You moan as Jacob begins kissing up your neck and towards your mouth.

"Oh and its 4, 1492 and I quote the entire periodic table," Jacob states in between kisses. "Hydrogen, helium, lithium, beryllium,"

"Okay, okay you're smart." You interrupt him, panting and wrapping your legs tightly around his waist. "Shut up and kiss me."

"Yes, ma'am." Jacob chuckles out as he returns to kissing you.

I turn and walk away unable to bear watching you swap saliva with Jacob Black; stand there witnessing his hands touch your smooth, soft skin or know that he's the reason behind your kiss swollen lips. I find Emily and we call it a night heading home far away from any thoughts and reminders of _you_ and Jacob Black.

* * *

A/N: Well here goes the next chapter. Wake-up Call update is in the works but turns out I have like 2 different versions of the next update. And what that means is that an executive decision must be made over which one to use or which will later become an outtake.

I've got good news! The good news is that the gym did NOT kick my ass. WOOHOO! IN YO' FACE ELLIPTICAL! Circuit training…KISS MY ASS! YAY! I guess it's always comforting to know that your _entire_ body isn't weak; mainly my thighs. =D

Even better news? I'm almost done with the first season of True Blood. That show is BANANAS! I mean me and my sis are talking to the TV that's how crazy this show is. Last night saw episodes 8 – 10 and Sookie found out about Sam. How come the shape shifters always get the worst treatment? What's so hot about vampires? Like when Sam burned Sookie I was all, "OH! In yo' face! Yea you mind-raping, hypocritical bitch! Give the shape shifters a tough time but Bill goes around killing people and you're okay with that."

If you haven't seen True Blood then I'm sorry if I spoiled anything…hopefully you skipped over that completely…or maybe you're like, 'Huh? Maybe I need to check out this show.' I'm telling you it's BANANAS! (and we say 'BANANAS' in our house because when a 3-yr old 'SHIT' isn't acceptable.)


	6. Leeches and Proposal

Leeches and Proposal

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters.**

* * *

We finally hear the word that the coven of vampires are on their way. Surprisingly, it is not from the small pixie –like leech called Alice but the scent is picked up while on a visit at Neah Bay, in the Makah rez. You, Emily and I along with your mother and brother are up in the area for a small Young family gathering. Jacob winds up coming as well, much to my disappointment, because you two are now practically inseparable. I tried confronting you again about your relationship with Jacob Black but you blew me off again and we wound up getting into a yelling match. You yelling that _I_ 'have no right' to butt into your life and tell you who is right for you while I yell back that he'll only hurt you, doesn't know you like I do and that this _isn't_ right. I don't understand how you cannot see that I know you better than you know yourself? Did you forget that I _wanted_ to marry you first? You were the _only_ girl for me. I've seen Emily before at the different powwows in La Push, Makah and even Spokane; there was nothing 'special' about her back then. She was just some regular girl, a little too skinny and seemed pretty vain and full of herself. We've talked a few times but that was only because I was being polite while waiting on you to come back from changing back into your normal clothes. Of course, you don't remember it and Emily seems to not remember it either.

But I sit back watching as you, Jacob and Seth all sit to the side laughing and talking amongst yourselves. My eyes lock onto Jacob's and even though there's a huge half-acre yard that separates us I can feel his anger, rage and animosity rolling off of him from over here. I've already spoken to him and the Council about your relationship trying to get them to see reason that you're playing with fire. That Jacob, as the heir of Ephraim Black, _cannot_ be with someone who can't even bear him children. It was a low blow but I had to get them to see the truth behind the whole situation; our lives stopped being normal the moment the wolf heat came in. You can't have kids and the alpha bloodline will end. Sure that means the right will fall upon either myself or possibly Paul but it's something that cannot be overlooked. The remark had incensed Jacob and the two of us wound up fighting and later phasing trying to tear each other to shreds. Both packs showed up and had to pry us apart; it was obvious by the amount of bite marks, scratches and blood that Jacob was the clear victor in our fight and in defeat I had to drop the subject with him and the Council.

I look away unable to keep staring at him as my hip still aches from when he bit into my side and threw me like I was nothing. I can't help but hope that I'm right, that you _never_ have his kids and eventually the alpha line will belong to my sons. My vengeful muses are cut short as you all suddenly stiffen and slowly turn around to look into the forest behind you. Jacob slowly stands up, his body completely tense and the way he raises his head I can tell he's trying to catch a scent. You get up and move towards your mother, whispering a warning to her which Sue only simply nods her head to you. I walk, deliberately, towards you wanting answers but find myself cut short by Seth who glares at me in a warning.

"Some leeches just cut through Makah." Seth states. "It's a coven; probably the coven that Alice warned us about."

"We're heading home, now." Jacob orders and I feel my will bend towards his command. "Lee's already calling everyone back home and she'll let the Cullens know too." Jacob states with a cool air about him.

"How many of them are there?" I ask. My only answer is a shrug and 'a lot' from both Jacob and Seth.

The family gathering is cut short and we all head back to La Push to meet in the Black's backyard. Collin and Brady inform us that they did pick up the scent and it's a fairly large coven of leeches numbering in about 20 or so. Your phone rings and your face pales as you listen to the person on the other end talking.

"Alright, alright it's going to be okay." You coo softly and I wonder who it is you're talking to. "I'm on my way, okay? Trust me E.J." Jacob growls in annoyance and I, along with my pack, all share looks of surprise because you're trying to calm down a leech. "Let's hurry up." You tell Jacob. "The Cullens have already moved out to the meadow to fight them there." With reluctance Jacob nods giving the go-ahead and we all move out towards the forest ready to phase and kill the leeches that are invading our lands. I fall back a little noticing that you and Jacob are still hanging behind.

"You be careful out there." Jacob states with a deep frown. You sigh at him and shake your head. "Don't make me regret letting you go out there."

"When have I _ever_ made you do something that you later regretted?" You ask with a coy smile. You laugh lightly as Jacob frowns as if concentrating on the question posed to him. "See? The fact that you have to think _so_ hard is proof." You wrap one arm around his waist and press your body into his.

"I'm sure there's at least one example." Jacob states with a frown. Looking down at you, he leans down and kisses your lips which you give back to him. The kiss doesn't last long, thank God, as you pull away from Jacob and jog off into the forest away from the rest of the wolves.

"I'm going to hold you responsible if anything happens to her." I growl out.

"I don't need you to," Jacob growls back at me. "She's _mine_ and I'll," Jacob says as his face and shoulders fall at his unfinished sentence. Shaking his head he turns into the woods and phase as I follow behind and join him.

It's interesting to be in everyone's head again as Jacob and I open up the alpha link between us. You are completely focused on any scents that may be heading towards the Cullens' place, Jacob is annoyed with your concern for the small hybrid and as I try to dig in and find out why; I find myself being blocked by Seth, Quil and Embry.

I do not have long to search as soon we come upon the fighting leeches and immediately split up to take out the leeches we don't recognize. Just like last time it's hard to keep up with you as you are darting all over the place latching on to legs and arms on the fly causing the unsuspecting vampire to lose its balance. With this distraction that you provide anyone else is then able to bite or pull the head off of the leech. My pack is also holding their own and the leeches' numbers is much higher than even Collin and Brady anticipated but we all manage to work as a team.

Finally there is only one giant leech left and he bolts running directly towards Jared. Jared holds his ground and we all move to try and circle the fucker before he can get away but he changes his course and heads directly at one of the cubs. He is completely caught off guard that he panics, skidding to a halt and loses his balance, tripping over his still oversized paws. I'm still too far away to provide any help and just as the leech is about to bite down on Eli, Jacob jumps in the way and knocks Eli out of the way. Jacob and the leech collide with such a powerful force that I feel the impact of it both physically and mentally. Shock doesn't last long as you jump on top of the leech and bite into the back of his neck before tearing his head away from his shoulders. The rest of your pack moves in and quickly tear him to pieces as Carlisle and Edward run to check on Jacob and the other Cullnes carry the remaining pieces off to be burned.

You immediately run to Jacob's side and in the attack our alpha link is broken. All I can do is stand and watch you licking his face and whimper; I assume that you're trying to get him to phase back and with much pain and struggling he succeeds. He is quickly carried away by his pack and two of the Cullen boys and a sudden wave of guilt hits me; it's Eli, he feels guilty that Jacob got hurt because he panicked. We all try to reassure him that he's done nothing wrong and that Jacob will be alright. Paul plays over in his head the last battle with the leeches and how badly Jacob got hurt to protect Leah. While he is replaying that memory I pick up a hint of panic, sadness and a flash of your face just before Jacob lunges to pull the leech away from you.

'_Wow, he loved her even then.'_ Jared comments and I see that I'm not the only one to have noticed the emotions involved during that fight. _'Guess it makes sense.'_ Jared says with a shrug as if the realization wasn't really anything new.

'_It does?'_ Brady asks.

'_Oh, yea, Jake has always had a crush on Lee-Lee.'_ Paul says with a huff and we all begin to follow Jacob's scent. _'Before there was Bella it was Leah. The only problem was that Sam_ had_ Leah at the time.'_ I feel all of the cubs eyes turn to look at me and I keep my mind blank. Years ago they could care less who was dating whom and I guess to hear it now that they are older and actually involved makes it even more interesting.

I head over to the Cullens' in silence and when we arrive it's the same heartrending screaming that haunted my dreams for days years ago when we were all one pack. Phasing we all sit outside waiting on the news to find out how bad this attack was; you are nowhere to be seen. Quil, Embry and Seth are all sitting outside with us while the rest of the Cullens mill about elsewhere and I can't help but wonder where the _hell_ they were, again, this time that prevented them from aiding in finishing off the last leech?

If leeches are supposed to be so quick and efficient killers then why is it that the Cullens, minus the big muscle boy, can't seem to help out more? Do they not want to get their cold hands dirty?

Eventually the screaming stops and you come out looking tired and worn. The hybrid runs directly to you and jumps into your arms, holding on to you tightly, crying and telling you all of his fears. You hold him in a comforting manner and shush him letting him know that everything is alright.

"The collision broke all the ribs on his left side, fractured his arm and his clavicle…its broken too. But Carlisle believes that he'll be back up and running in a few days. There doesn't seem to be any internal damage this time but he'll confirm it later on." You explain to all present as you soothe and rock the hybrid.

There is a sense of relief that Jacob will be alright but there is still a heavy tension in the air. It's palpable but I'm unable to pinpoint the source until I look behind me to see Bella Cullen glaring murderously at you holding her son. The emotion-controlling leech is inside helping keep Jacob calm leaving Bella to feel however the hell she wants. I growl at her, giving her a clear, cut warning to not try any crazy bullshit and she hisses back at me. When I turn back around I notice that all eyes are glaring darkly at Bella as well except yours; you're busy playing a simple childhood hand game with the hybrid.

And in that moment, watching you interact with a child I regret ever wishing that you wouldn't have any kids with Jacob. Despite your cold and harsh attitude you've always held a soft spot for children. They relax and feel comfortable around you. I know it's because you make them feel safe but you don't treat them as if they are incapable of doing certain things. You've always allowed Claire some sense of independence up to a point and instead of telling her she can't do something, you simply tell her to wait or say, 'maybe next time'. My eyes soften looking at you and I'm reminded of what I've lost because of the monsters behind me.

Quil leaves to go inform the Council of the current events and all of the wolves move into the Cullens home to find Jacob laid out on a couch. You grumble at him for not agreeing to rest in a bed like a good patient but he simply states that 'the stench isn't so unbearable down here'.

Over the next few days both packs remain at the Cullens keeping a protective circle around Jacob. Carlisle often times finds it hard to get to Jacob to check his injuries because of the snoozing bodies of the cubs on the floor. Billy stops by to check-up on Jacob's progress and is grateful that he's alright and is being looked after.

You move around the house with the ease of someone who has spent many hours here, helping the mother leech prepare breakfast, lunch, dinner and everything else in between for the wolves. The small hybrid follows you around happily like a puppy. He skips behind you, humming to you and is always eager to please you. He hugs your waist tightly whenever you stop much to the annoyance of Jacob.

He watches your every move around the child with close scrutiny as if at any moment you're going to make some kind of mistake with the child. He doesn't relax until you're seated tucked underneath his arm. The hybrid seems to only frown at Jacob's actions and it is then that I finally get a good look at the creature that you said was not a threat. He has hair like his father but his skin isn't the bloodless pale or even the translucent pale complexion his mother had when she was alive. His skin is tanned and it must be from playing outside. His eyes are a deep brown and I know that they used to belong to his mother. Jacob's thoughts on those same eyes were so strong that for a while there I'd forgotten the color of Emily's eyes. I can't help but roll my eyes to learn that his full name is Edward Jacob Cullen showing that Bella _still_ can't seem to let Jacob go. It's this strange and unnatural attachment to something that isn't hers that seems to be a trait passed on down to her son. Will this _E.J._ try to find some way to hold onto you?

One night I come out of my sleep to hear you giggling and my stomach churns. I lay perfectly still hoping that sleep will come back and take away the images of you and Jacob getting cozy and grabby on the couch behind me.

"I finally remember an example." Jacob says quietly after planting a kiss on you…somewhere. You must look at him with a questioning look and he continues on. "You made me break my arm – _that's_ something that _you_ made me regret."

"How the _hell_ did I make you break your arm?" You ask is a harsh whisper.

"Easy, you said that you'd marry whoever could climb the tallest tree, the one off the trail to the beach," Jacob clarifies and I feel my stomach clench because I remember that declaration that a then 11-year old Leah Clearwater had made. You were always such a tomboy and you climbed that monstrous tree and tied your favorite ribbon on one of the branches. It was proof that you had climbed higher than anyone else on the rez ever has. You did it because for one, you didn't think anyone would try and two, if everyone failed it meant you didn't have to worry about just marrying any stupid boy on the rez.

"…Yea." You answer and I can hear the frown in your voice.

"Well…I climbed that tree trying to get your _stupid_ ribbon."

"And you fell? Why'd you even try you goofball?" You whisper and I can hear Jacob chuckle.

"Yes, I fell and wound up not only breaking it but dislocating my shoulder too." I remember it well because every boy in the rez came to see Jacob Black and sign his cast or at least tried too but it was a solid black. Everyone, including me, was impressed that he had tried. "I wanted to marry you." Jacob admits and there is pregnant silence that falls in the room. Whether it's my own ears playing tricks on me or what I don't know but I feel my heart racing.

"I came to see you and you _told me_ that you got it cliff diving." You huff and I can hear a sharp hiss escape from Jacob – you must've shoved him.

"I didn't want you to know that I had failed."

"Well I _still_ would've been impressed." You tell him. "Sam later climbed up and got it." And I can't help the proud smile that graces my lips knowing that you remember it. I didn't try until months later after Jacob had healed but that was because I _knew_ he was going to try and get your ribbon again.

"I know, the _bastard_ raced me up the tree trying to get to it first." Jacob states with a low growl. It was one of many triumphs that I had over Jacob Black. Though I guess it really wasn't much when you consider that by his second attempt I was 13 and he was 9. You giggle and I know you're picturing us both as boys racing to climb up a tree for a ribbon you never imagined anyone would bother over. _That's_ how much you meant to the both of us.

"Funny how Sam didn't mention there being a race."

"I came pretty close but, damnit, if his arms weren't longer then mine and he had a much better reach." Jacob explains and despite his loss there was a hint of pride in his voice. I guess there would be because he was telling the truth. He was quick climbing up that tree and his lighter weight allowed him to take the branches without much hesitation.

"Well we know how _that_ turned out in the end." You admit. "But you should've told me and maybe things would've turned out differently."

"Marry me." Jacob says.

"Probably would've." You say back and I feel my back tighten as I slowly realize that Jacob wasn't talking about the possibilities of you agreeing to marry him then.

"No, marry me." Jacob repeats and I feel my heart racing, pounding inside of my chest as if it's bursting to get out.

"Wait…what?" You ask and I hear the couch shift under Jacob's weight.

"You're going to wake everyone up." Jacob scolds. "Marry me, Lee." There's silence and I'm too afraid to turn over and see if he has an engagement ring or what your expression is.

"Say 'yes' so we can go back to sleep." Quil grumbles and there is laughing all around the room.

"Or better yet just say 'no'." Paul adds.

"This is _so_ not romantic." You grumble.

"And since when have _we_ ever done romantic?" Jacob scoffs.

"We do sometimes." You snap back and there goes another hiss of pain. "But, 'yes' I _will_ marry you. But you gotta tell me what I made you regret."

"You made me regret not being big enough." Jacob admits and there's a roar of 'ahs' and 'pussy' from Paul.

"And now look at you," Embry teases. "You're the biggest guy on the rez."

"And I like em _big_." You state there is a hint of an sexual innuendo in your comment.

"Really then how come you're wasting time with his tiny pecker and not trying to get this?" Paul asks and there is more laughter. Even I have to chuckle at the comment and sit up deciding to join in the moment.

"Your dick and ego are two _very_ different things." You sneer at Paul. "I'm just glad that Rachel doesn't have to worry about waking up sore the next morning." Paul growls at you and everyone begins laughing even harder.

"I help you work out those muscles though, don't I?" Jacob asks easily picking you up and placing you in his lap.

"And _that's_ romantic." You state your eyes shining as you start laughing.

Despite the pain of bearing witness to you accepting the marriage proposal of another man it is nice to see you happy, laughing and joking. This is the Lee-Lee I've longed to see and have missed deeply. You and Paul go back and forth throwing out jabs at one another that cross of the line decency but never cross the line of malicious and spiteful. I can't help but sit back and marvel how the two packs interact.

_This is how it should've always been._

* * *

A/N: And I think _this_ is my longest chapter for this story yet. ^-^ I'm feeling pretty good about this chapter. It hit me last night after the movies and I woke up early this morning to type up some more and finished it at work.

Let me tell you _this_ is quite the pick me up after what came out of Wake-up Call which I'll finish up the rest of the afternoon working on. If all goes well I should have it done, proofed and ready to post tonight! That's my goal! You hear me brain and fingers! (Very hard to shake your fist menacingly at your fingers) We're going to get this shit done. RIGHT!

…*brain is blank and fingers just sit*

Damn you all! -_-; So cursing yourself and your appendages only makes you look crazy while sitting at your desk….so, yea, don't do it unless you're in the sanctity of your own room. But on the plus side…people will think twice before starting shit with me.

WHICH REMINDS ME! So, a while back I had an A/N where I ranted about some girl who got smart with me. Did I tell you guys this or was it just Cu? Anywho, this chick got smart with me because _she_ wasn't doing her job and I docked her for it. It's one my duties to audit others work to make sure that orders are in order and all that jazz. But she sends me back this sarcastic remark about her score. So I told her _supervisor_ that I don't need this kind of attitude from her. That was me remaining professional because what I really wanted to say was,

"Look, if she was doing her damn job then _I_ wouldn't've _had_ to give her a zero. Tell her next time she got sumtin' smart to say, to come and say it to my face and we'll settle it real propa."

Phew, so I can admit that I've got some ghetto in me despite my very well spoken English. Thanks Catholic school education, thanks. 0=D

But anyways…THE BITCH IS GONE! So it's kind of bittersweet in that I'm glad that I ain't gotta put up her shit no more but also bad because the economy is kinda rough out there. There aren't too many jobs out there to be had. So God forgive me got the slight feeling of vindication and keep her – Amen. P.S. – Good looking out. *kisses index and middle finger and throws them up to the ceiling with a wink*

Alright, so on that note if you could all just go ahead and review. *smiles innocently* I'd greatly appreciate it. It'd make my day even better. ^-^


	7. Bella's Upstaging

Bella's Upstaging

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters. And I realize that no matter what…Bella will always suck.**

* * *

I've never had a whole lot of friends growing up and I feel pretty certain that before I moved up here to Forks with Charlie my junior year that I could count the amount of 'friends' that I've had on one hand. _That's_ why you've always meant so much to me. You were my friend without making me feel awkward, insecure or that I was a somehow a freak.

You were sweet, innocent, naïve, helpful and dependable. You became that girlfriend that I knew I could always count on to stay with me through thick and through thin. It wasn't _my_ fault that you fell in love with me and couldn't accept my relationship with Edward Cullen, who just so happened to be a vampire and your mortal enemy.

It wasn't easy but I tried to make the two of you friends because you two were one of the few most important people in my life. You remained stubborn, heartless and cruel by continuing to believe that _you_ could make me happy. You could never make me feel as happy as Edward does. You could never make me feel as if I fit into the world around me. I never told you this because I figured it'd only hurt you or make you turn and walk away from me to never return but I've never felt like I belonged in the weak and pathetic body that I was born in.

I thought that you were finally coming around to seeing all of that but it turns out that you weren't. You were only losing interest in me. The thought that you'd develop some kind of bond, relationship, _feelings_ for Leah Clearwater never crossed my mind. I can admit that I was too wrapped up into feeding my sweet 'Nudger' and enjoying your and Edward's continual presence to notice anything else.

When you stepped outside, I figured it was only to get away from the so-called 'bad smell'. Instead you were going outside to be with _her_. What was _she_ offering you that I couldn't? Did you sleep with her while _my_ ribs and pelvic bones were being fractured and I was suffering? Would you have been there for the birth if you weren't already inside with me? You didn't even stick around. Edward says you were there long enough to give Edward the go ahead to inject me with vampire venom through a syringe.

_I wasn't even _turned_ the way I wanted to be. Edward was supposed to have_ bitten _me and drunk my blood_.

Did she hold you? And comfort you while I was going through my painful transformation? NO! No, she didn't because _she_ was too busy holding, cooing and feeding _my_ son. Despite the fact that _she_ gave up on you so easily and so quickly; you still chose to stand by her side. That's what you did after I finally woke up and found myself in the body I always should've had and became the person I was always meant to be.

After feeding as we were heading home I'm greeted with you, Seth and _her_ standing in front of the house. The look she gave me infuriated me and I wanted to rip her head off for standing there as if _she_ was better than me. Didn't _she_ realize that I was no longer the poor, weak girl any longer? But I remained calm as Edward conversed with her and to my horror to realize that _she,_ the bitch, that – that _mongrel_ had imprinted on _my_ son. I lost my control and flew into a blood thirsty rage. I was going to kill _her_ and free my son from the demonic hold that _she_ was trying to put on him.

But…instead, _you_ stood against me in order to protect her. I'll never forget the way my back suddenly hurt, the loud and echoing sound of marble cracking; it was my body. You were willing to _break_ my new body. When I opened my eyes _you_ were standing over me, snarling, growling and flashing your canines at me. Your paw was placed firmly at my throat and I _knew_ that if you put any more pressure there that you could've easily decapitated me. Gone was that warmth that you once held for me in your eyes.

That was the first clear sign that I had lost you.

You no longer had time for me; nor did you even bother to _make_ time for me. But you were always quick to spend it with _Leah_. The only time I saw you were when Leah came over to spend some time with E.J. I had expected you to come back around once you realized that Leah wouldn't want you but…somehow, Leah _did_ still want you. Even with E.J. around she still noticed you and teased you when you would get frustrated with the amount of time spent.

You had told me that I would _know_ when you had imprinted on someone and I suppose that _this_ is what you meant. You ignored me and made me feel as if I wasn't important anymore. When I confronted you about it, you grew angry and yelled at me. You said, 'You _can't_ have _everything_ you want. Sometimes people lose things because of their actions; those are just the consequences.' You stormed off after that and when I finally worked up the nerve to find you, to ask you what you were talking about – I was shocked. You were in _her_ arms. _She_ was holding and comforting you; telling you that she was proud of you for standing up against _me_.

_Me? _

She made it sound as if _I_ was the bad guy in all of this. All I wanted was _my_ friend back, _my_ Jacob back. The longer I stood watching you two hug one another the angrier I became. _Your_ hands weren't in a 'friend' like place; you were holding her close at the small of her back. Your bodies were flush, pressed so close together that I don't even think a sheet of paper could get in between you. She scratched the hair at the nape of your neck as she whispered words I couldn't understand in your ear. And I looked on in horror as you buried your nose in her neck before kissing it.

The two of you kissed! I ran away before I could see anymore because I couldn't believe, I didn't _want_ to believe it. And so…I didn't. You both were just caught up in a moment; you were hurt and needed some kind of release and Leah, in her broken state, must've needed some kind of physical contact. That was it and nothing more. You stood up for her because she was your beta and pack mate.

With that thought aside I tried to focus on my son, E.J., who looked so much like his father but had my eyes; or what _used_ to be my eyes. Leah had told Charlie about me and because of _that_ we couldn't leave Forks as soon as I would've liked. Edward later said that leaving Forks probably wouldn't have been such a smart idea since we still had to go to see the Volturri to prove that I had been changed. If word got out that we had left and they picked up on E.J.'s scent there is _no_ telling what would happen next. It was safer to stay put, let me gain control of my thirst, let Carlisle finish his testing on E.J. and let Leah look out for him in the meantime.

I had hoped that Rosalie would've kept Leah away from my son but instead _she_ encouraged the imprint. They both looked after him; sometimes together and sometimes apart. I guess it was because neither of them could have a child of their own…but wait? Why did Leah imprint on my son if she couldn't have kids? I kept that question to myself and tried not to think about it.

Eventually I grew to accept Leah's role in my new life. She was always there for E.J. whenever he needed someone the most. She taught him some of the most simplest and basic games; regardless of all the expensive toys that Alice and Esme bought for him, all he wanted was to be outside and play with Leah. She took him to places where the rest of us couldn't go and introduced him to some of the kids in Forks. You didn't approve but I was grateful that she was trying to give my son as normal and social life as she possibly could. I will admit that I envied the huge smile that would appear on his face when he think or talk about Leah. The stories he would tell about the park, the zoo, the ice cream shop and even Wal-Mart were all great big adventures to him; adventures I could _never_ participate in.

You, Edward and Rosalie tried to warn me of what it was I was giving up by becoming a vampire and I realize what it is. I will never be able to play with my son the way he wants me to. He'd much rather spend the day at the beach with you and Leah then run into the forest with me, his mother, and father. It does hurt that my own son would rather be around a pack of smelly wolves then his own cultured, refined and perfect family.

Sure E.J. says that he loves me but it's not a love that's like the love he has for Leah. _He's_ supposed to _my_ sweet 'Nudger' and instead he walks around continually nudging Leah. Always seeking her attention, affection, approval, time – _everything_.

But all of that changes one day as Leah walks into our home and gives E.J. to Rosalie. It's the first time I've seen Leah upset around E.J. and neither Edward nor Jasper can get a read of what is going on. All she does is kiss E.J. on the forehead as she always does before ruffling his hair and says, "I'll see you around, kid."

The words shock us all because Leah _always_ says, 'I'll see you tomorrow, Sweetheart' especially considering how _tomorrow_ is E.J.'s first birthday, he'll be officially a year old. He'd gone shopping with you and Leah to pick up a few things for his party. We all know that she wouldn't have missed it for the world and yet she was implying that she might _not_ make it? It's funny how quickly he picks up on this change in routine and latches onto Leah crying and begging her not to go; not to leave him. We all demand to know where she is going and what is going on. Leah assures us that she just has a lot on her mind but she'll be back after she works it out. And before any of us can question her further, she phases and tears off towards the tree. I try to convince Edward to go and bring her back here to answer our questions properly but Edward only shakes his head. Apparently, Leah is faster than even a newborn vampire. But I agree to drop the matter for the moment and we go on about our day.

We hear the news hours after Leah's already left; although E.J.'s strange and erratic behavior should've been our first clue that something was definitely wrong. Seth comes over and informs us that Leah has left the state but to where we have no idea. As my son sits crying his eyes out I _demand_ that Seth joins us in searching for Leah but he only shakes his head.

"Apparently, _this_ is what she wanted to do." Seth simply states and I growl at him. How can he just _stand_ there and say such things when _my_ son is in pain. When I snap at Seth stating Leah's callous, cold treatment and her total disregard for others' feelings; he simply looks at me and chuckles dryly while shaking his head before walking away. When I demand to know _why_ he is laughing at me in such a condescending tone he responds back with. "I just find it very hypocriticalof _you_ to be upset with Leah when she's made a decision to do whatever it is the hell _she_ wants to do. You were like this not too long ago and didn't care about how others were affected." I'm shocked as I stand looking at Seth Clearwater; the little boy who followed behind Jacob Black to protect my unborn child. He's comparing my actions to _hers_? Everything I did was out of love; love for Edward. What Leah's doing is completely and without a doubt selfish and for her own…what? Selfish gain?

I rally the Cullens to begin a search for Leah; we have to find my son's imprint so that he'll stop crying and will smile again. Jacob and Sam's pack also help us in the search and we find it hard to pinpoint her exact spot as we lose her scent about 67-miles south of Seattle, Washington. I can't believe she hitchhiked.

Questions still abound as to _what_ could've prompted this sudden disappearance on Leah's part and fear begins to settle in thinking that maybe she's been kidnapped? Maybe the Volturri have her and are holding her hostage in some attempt to get a hold of Edward, Alice, E.J and I? But my fears turn into anger realization as I am talking to Emily and she mentions Jacob's little outburst in Wal-Mart the last day that we saw Leah. I don't understand _why_ Jacob would have kissed Leah? She was _my_ son's imprint and he is nothing more than her alpha.

I finally go to my son and ask him to use his special gift to show me exactly what happened on the last day that he saw Leah. E.J. starts off with the moment Jacob threw a fit in the store about Leah and her treatment of _my_ son, _her_ imprint. You even went so far as to use vulgar language but you _do_ apologize once Leah is out the store and I see the rest through E.J.'s eyes.

* * *

Leah is quiet as she gently places E.J. in the back seat of the Rabbit sparing him a quick smile as she straps him in. I can all feel the warmth her body gives off and whatever fears or worries that were there over Jacob are now gone. Leah puts the seat back but doesn't close the door and moves around Jacob to put the groceries in the trunk.

"Lee, I'm – I'm sorry, baby." Jacob apologizes. "I shouldn't have lost my temper like that." Jacob grab Leah's waist and presses her back against the Rabbit and I can all see how close and intimate the two of them are. "I love you." Jacob says with a small smile on his face before leaning in and capturing Leah's lips in a soft and passionate kiss. I can feel E.J.'s eyes widen in surprise as Jacob's hands touch and grab at Leah's body in a way that makes him feel uncomfortable and I angered.

"Jake, Jake that's enough." Leah breathes out as he only moves to her neck.

"Forgive me?" He asks sounding hopeful.

"I forgive you but you need to learn how to calm down." Leah tells him as the Rabbit shakes when the trunk is closed.

"Easier said than done." Jacob tells her chuckling as they both climb into the front seats. E.J. sits back, glaring darkly at Jacob and we can feel the venom pooling in his mouth. "Especially when you're around." Jacob says as his voice grows real husky and he leans over to plant another kiss on Leah's neck.

"I want to go home." E.J. hisses as Leah giggles.

"You bet you're going home." Jacob throws out giving E.J. a dark look in the rearview mirror. I can feel E.J.'s hatred and anger towards Jacob and slowly begin to realize that this _isn't_ the first time that he's made a grab at Leah. I see slight flashes of memories involving Jacob and Leah sitting somewhere alone sitting and kissing one another.

"Ready for your party tomorrow, Sweetheart?" Leah asks turning around and smiling sweetly.

"Yea, _we're_ going to have so much fun tomorrow, Leah." E.J. answers enthusiastically. I hear Jacob grumble from the front seat, obviously, at my son.

"Yes, we are. It's not every day your birthday comes." E.J. eagerly shakes his head showing his agreement with Leah.

"Alright, turn around." Jacob orders nudging Leah with his shoulder. I look as Leah rolls her eyes at him but winks at E.J. and turns back around. He chuckles at Leah but stops short when Jacob opens his mouth again.

"You know Billy's going to be over Charlie's tonight, right?" Jacob asks and there's a hint of an innuendo in his tone that _I_ can pick up on but is lost on E.J.

"I did know that." Leah answers back and the two of them exchange looks.

"And?" Jacob asks his hand reaching over and disappearing behind the chair. Leah gasps before snarling at him.

"And…I think you better not _make_ me change my mind." Leah growls out. I feel a sense of pleasure and satisfaction overcome me hearing Leah growl at Jacob causing him to snatch his hand back.

"I need to make a stop before we drop his royal _highness_ off." I hear only a soft 'okay' from Leah as Jacob pulls over. "Come in with me." Jacob says to Leah.

"I'm coming in too." E.J. says excitedly and begins to unfasten his seatbelt.

"NO!" Jacob snarls whipping around and glaring murder at my son. "No, you _stay_ in here. _We_ won't be long." Jacob states before moving to get out.

"It'll only be a minute, Sweetheart." Leah coos softly as I feel tears begin to prickle E.J.'s eyes. Just like magic all of the hurt is gone seeing Leah's beautiful and reassuring smile. Leah's door opens as _he_ stands outside waiting for her to get out. "Be good until I get back, okay?"

"Let's go, Lee." Jacob calls and as E.J. turns to frown at him through the window, Leah is already gone and the door slammed shut. I sit back and watch as Jacob take Leah's hand into his and leads her into the store. Despite the request E.J. still gets up and climbs into the front seat before opening the door.

_I'm almost 1-years old. I _don't_ have to do whatever __Jacob Black__ tells me to do_.

It's the reasoning that rings in my head before shutting the car door and pulling the store door open. It's a small store, that I don't recognize, but there's a tall Indian at the counter and he only nods as E.J. walks into the store before returning back to his magazine.

E.J. begins his search for Leah, stopping to look at all the different bagged foods. I hear giggling and begin to move faster knowing that I've found Leah but stop before turning the corner completely. _Jacob's_ holding Leah from behind and _I_ realize that they're looking at condoms and feel relieved that E.J. doesn't know it. E.J.'s eyes move to watch Jacob gently brush Leah's hair aside, exposing the back of her neck and he begins to kiss and suck on it.

"And tell me _why_ you couldn't just get these on your own?" Leah asks and to _my_ horror she begins to grind against him.

"Because it's the only way to get you alone like this when _it's_ around." Jacob hisses and thrusts into Leah. "This will help you stay focused when we drop it,"

"His name is E.J., Jake." Leah sighs.

"Like _I_ care." Jacob growls out. "The _only_ reason I put up with _him_ and Bella is because of you." He growls and hearing those words cut me deep. Is this really what we've become?

"I'm sorry about that." Leah says after letting out a soft 'awe'. "I'll make it up to you."

"I know you will." Jacob growls out as his hand moves to Leah's and brings it behind her. Placing her hand over his crotch do I suddenly become aware of Jacob's hard-on. The two of them are so wrapped up into each other, touching and stroking that they're not aware of the small child that is watching this.

I can feel E.J.'s heart beating rapidly as he watches _Jacob_ touching _his_ Leah. Jacob's hands touching places that E.J.'s not ever dreamed of touching before but that he registers as being personal, intimate and exclusive to someone special. In his mind, E.J. knows that _he's_ special to Leah just like she's special to him and the idea hits him.

_He's trying to take her away from me._

"Guys, there's a kid in here." What I can only assume is the clerk at the first counter. Jacob only shrugs his shoulders as Leah freezes. With the man's voice breaking the moment, E.J. finds his anger and courage and runs towards Jacob as Leah moves to head towards the front of the store.

"YOU STUPID MUTT!" E.J. yells and punches him in the junk. Jacob drops to his knees letting a loud and vicious growl escape his throat. I can see the anger, hatred and desire for revenge in Jacob's eyes as his body begins to tremble and E.J.'s heightened hearing picks up on his body getting ready to go through the transformation. I can feel E.J.'s instincts kicking in telling him to bite the man, to inject his venom inside of him and end his life right here and right now.

The only thing that stops a full out vampire/shape shifter war is Leah who quickly gets in between them receiving a sharp bite on the thigh from E.J. I can feel the panic building up inside of him as he realizes his mistake and moves quickly to suck the venom out; he was planning on injecting more than what he was told to allow. Fortunately, Leah remains calm and tells Jacob to go finish his purchase.

Jacob's angry growl sounds so far away and muffled as E.J. greedily drinks Leah's blood and even though I never imagined it being possible but it's the sweetest thing ever. I can feel Leah's smooth skin and her muscles contracting under E.J.'s light touch and it only makes him thirsty for more. Her blood courses through his veins as he forgets his reason for feeding and his hands runs up and down the smooth and soft skin of her thighs. I am embarrassed to admit that my son enjoys this new feeding position more than he should.

"Enough, E.J." Leah hisses and puts pressure on his head to gently move him away. "Let's go." Leah orders and snatches E.J.'s wrist and leads him out the store as the guy at the counter chuckles at Jacob.

Leah puts E.J. in the backseat and climbs into hers letting out a deep sigh. Quickly, E.J. climbs into the front seat and straddles Leah's lap before burying his face into her chest. He fights back the hot tears that are threatening to come out as he clings to her tightly; he inhales her rich, warm scent and relaxes a little feeling her hands gently rub his back. Before E.J. can open his mouth to ensure that Leah is alright, Jacob appears and glares down at him.

"Get in the back seat." Jacob orders and E.J. quickly shakes his head 'no'. "I'm not asking you, I'm _telling_ you." Jacob snarls.

"NO! Leah, I want you to spend the night with me tonight." E.J. says quickly looking up at Leah, his eyes filled with unshed tears.

"NO, SHE'S NOT! NOW GET YOUR ASS IN THE BACK SEAT!" Jacob yells.

"We're getting ready to leave, Sweetheart." Leah says calmly hugging him tightly. "You know the rules for when we're in a moving vehicle."

"Then _he_ needs to learn to keep _his_ hands to himself and on the wheel." E.J. hisses venomously as the tears begin to fall.

"Go on, little man." Leah says completely unfazed by the hostility arising in the tiny car. E.J. does as Leah asks but not before glaring hatefully at Jacob on the way back.

The moment E.J. is seated; Jacob backs out of the small parking lot and gets on the road towards the Cullens. The ride is silent except for the occasional growl from Jacob, sigh from Leah and sniffle from E.J.

"You're _not_ spending the night with him." Jacob says cutting the silence.

"If _I_ want her to she will." E.J. snaps back before Leah can respond.

"Shut the," Jacob growls but is cut off by Leah.

The two begin speaking in a language foreign to E.J. but the anger and hostility is not lost in translation; E.J. sits back trying to pick up words that he can understand as Leah and Jacob continue arguing and yelling at one another – I can only assume it is the Quileute old language.

Suddenly, the car jerks to the right and Jacob gets out of the car with a deep growl. There is a moment of fear, confusion and disorientation as E.J. did not put his seatbelt on as Leah had always told him to.

"Stand up." Jacob orders as he yanks opens Leah's door.

"Jake, let's just get home, okay?" Leah asks softly, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Stand up, Leah." Jacob orders with a deep growl and with a sigh, Leah complies. E.J. looks on as Jacob drops to his knees and turns Leah around, his hand running up her thigh and stopping suddenly. "I knew it! He _bit_ you." Jacob snarls standing up.

"You _know_ he bites me sometimes." Leah states before moving to stand in between Jacob and E.J.

"He injected his venom inside of you, didn't he?" E.J. feels guilt wash over him as he looks down at his hands that are red with Leah's dried blood. "He _broke_ the treaty, Leah." Jacob snarls.

"He's just a child." Leah argues back.

"A _child_ that can either kill or _change_ someone into a leech, Leah." Jacob snaps back. "I mean, Leah, _listen_ to yourself. He's a fucking,"

"STOP CURSING LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF HIM!" Leah yells.

"WHY? AFRAID I'M GOING TO CORRUPT YOUR SWEET PRECIOUS, SWEETHEART? FUCK HIM AND FUCK YOU!" Jacob snarls and the two are having a standoff glaring at one another. Both are standing tense and look close to phase. "I – I'm sorry, baby. I didn't mean it." Jacob apologizes as he turns around and runs a hand through his hair. "Lee, you know how _I_ feel about you." Jacob whispers softly, gently and coaxingly as he pulls her in for a hug. "You mean everything to me and I don't want to lose you."

"Leah," E.J. calls from inside of the Rabbit and Jacob's muscles tense but his hold doesn't loosen. "Leah, I don't _want_ you hanging around Jacob anymore." E.J. states in a childish pout.

"Yea, well I don't _want_ Leah," Jacob starts but stops as Leah pulls away from him.

"Let's just get him home." Leah whispers softly and with a defeated sigh Jacob gets into the Rabbit and drives towards the Cullens.

* * *

From there the memory ends because I've seen all that I've needed to see. It's _Jacob's_ fault that my son's imprint has disappeared. Jacob is _again_ trying to have something that doesn't belong to him. He's somehow found a way to guilt trip Leah into becoming his fuck-buddy. And on top of that he's not held any remorse towards being so upfront and provocative with Leah whilst in front of my son. I can only assume that Leah has asked E.J. not to tell anyone about Jacob's attitude as it seems that she deals with it most times. It suddenly becomes clear as to why there are times where I don't see Jacob for days or Jacob is teased by Embry and Quil when he's not allowed over the Clearwaters.

This one instance has been all it takes for the special 'friendship' that I once held for Jacob Black to break. He's a selfish, impulsive and conceded _mongrel_ who is only looking to hurt those I love most all because I didn't choose him over _my_ Edward.

It's funny but when I saw Leah in our front yard, standing and hugging E.J. tightly I felt certain that _this_ would be all the punishment that Jacob would need. She finally came back home to be with her imprint, my son. Jacob would see that he lost to my son and realize that he can't play with people's emotions and try to force them to do something that they don't want to do. But I am surprised to find out that it's the other way around; Leah states to all of us that she's broken her imprint and is free to love whomever she wants. And I'm shocked to find out that she chooses Jacob.

"Don't you love me?" E.J. asks staring up at Leah with huge, sad eyes.

"Of course, I still love you, Sweetheart." Leah says smiling down at him sweetly. "I'll _never _stop loving you but it's just that I _love_ Jacob too." Leah begins explaining as she sits down on the grass, holding E.J. in her arms and placing a light kiss on his forehead. "I love Jacob like your Mommy and Daddy love one another. And I _love_ you just like your Aunt Rose and Grandma Esme loves you." I stand looking on in shock as Leah sits sweetly explaining to myself the type of love she has for him. He frowns thinking over the explanation and then looks back towards us as if seeking clarification that what Leah is saying is true.

To my surprise, the rest of the family all nod their heads in agreement.

"Okay, Leah." E.J. says excitedly with a huge smile upon his face. "So _you're not_ mad at me?" He asks with a hint of worry.

"No, I'm not mad at you. I just needed some time away to clear my head and figure out the best way to solve this problem." Leah admits rubbing her cheek against E.J.'s and tickling his sides so that his sweet laughter rings out. "But I _am_ sorry that I missed your birthday party."

"It wasn't much of a party with you missing." Alice speaks up. From there the conversation picks up that there will be another party to not only celebrate E.J.'s birthday with his favorite girl but also to celebrate Leah's homecoming.

Somehow the relationship between Leah, E.J. and the rest of the Cullens remains intact but our relationship becomes even more strained then it once was in the beginning. I cannot find it in myself to forgive Leah for abandoning my son like this all for the sake of Jacob Black. In fact, I don't believe it and know that it's only a matter of time before the imprint takes full effect once E.J. is full grown and Leah will realize that she's _almost_ made a grave mistake. Leah thinks that she can so _easily_ explain her problems away just like _that_?

Time passes; E.J. continues to grow but his growth spurt is slowing down and by his third birthday he looks to be about 10-years old. Alice had foreseen some vampires coming to 'see' E.J. as the Volturri decided to let the word get out about our half-breed family member. These vampires' true intentions are lost upon us as they continually change their minds or possibly are arguing amongst themselves over whether or not to take him or…what?

As much as it frustrates me to admit, I am _glad_ that Leah was able to talk Jacob and Sam into aiding us in protecting E.J. from these vampires.

They show up and a fight breaks out. I stay out of the fight, hand-to-hand combat still not my forte and I stay behind with E.J. and Esme to help protect him in case some of the members from the other coven manage to break through. This war with a coven did not hold the fear, drama and uncertainty that the first war with Victoria held for me. I was concerned for Edward but that worrying for Jacob was none existent. I have long since given up those feelings a long time ago and focus on what has always been my top priority, my family.

In the end, E.J. along with the rest of the Cullens were all perfectly fine and Jacob suffered another injury while protecting another pack mate. Jacob _always_ seems to make rash decisions at such critical moments in his life where he feels as if it's all or nothing. And so what does he do? He _proposes_ to Leah Clearwater; the woman that has stolen not only my best friend but my _son_ and now has Alice and Esme all in a tizzy over planning this big huge wolf wedding with a crazy forest theme.

Everything that was _meant_ to be mine now for some strange reason belongs to _her_. My best friend, _my son_ and now even my own sisters.

* * *

A/N: So I've had this story for a couple of weeks now and couldn't seem to get too deep into Bella…and I realize because Bella _isn't_ a deep, complicated and complex character. She is what you see; shallow, vain, weak, pathetic and selfish. So I can say that _without a doubt_ this is my least favorite chapter I've ever written. I don't think I'll be writing from Bella's POV anymore. I know that I said writing the last Sam chapter in Wake-up Call was my worst…but this one has topped the list.

Ugh, I hate you, Bella. I HATE YOU SO MUCH! YOU HAVE NO DEPTH! NO PERSONALITY! NO HEART! NO BACKBONE! NO SOUL! OR EVEN THE COMMON SENSE TO REALIZE THAT WARM HOT WOLF ABS IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN COLD, FRIGID, MOODY AND PALE…DOOR! *breathes heavily* I couldn't think of anything else but happened to look up and noticed my bedroom door. It's what Edward looked like when he took his shirt off in New Moon…just throw some hair on top…and knock off a couple of inches from the height and width…but, but you all get the idea.

Thanks for all of the reviews and even the alerts and reads. ^-^ Someday I hope to see a review from everyone.

But now that I've got this out…knocked out…let's see what's up next in Wake-up Call. Hehehe.


	8. Quileute Days

Quileute Days

****

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters and Quileute Days is actually celebrated in La Push...so, no I didn't make that up either. I would like to go some day. ^-^ Mmm hmmm.**

* * *

It's July and it has been unseasonably warm this summer, the amount of rainy days steadily dropping and for everyone on the Olympic Peninsula it has been like a vacation but at home. The weather is looking promising for this year's Quileute Days which means the Makah, Sioux and Quileutes coming together, camping out, bonfires, tribal dancing, old stories being passed around, and booths of all kinds opening and selling all sorts of things ranging from tribal bracelets to canoes and from delicious fry bread to beer will have perfect weather.

You've been engaged to Jacob for about 4-months now and I've _heard_, from Kim who heard from Rachel, that you're steadily pulling your wedding plans together. There is no rushing and there are no phone conversations between us talking about different ideas and plans for your wedding. It's what we had always talked and joked about doing when we were finally engaged. We were going to plan out every detail together, visit every venue together and taste test every food item _together_.

For my wedding you didn't even bother showing up for the planning when I invited you. You did show up _one_ time and one time only but that was for a luncheon that guaranteed free food. But then the rest of your pack had shown up as well and instead of discussing the food, cake and decorations with me; you instead had the conversation with Jacob.

At the time I just assumed that you were talking to him about everything to spite me; to prove to me that you still had an interest in these kinds of things but just didn't want to do any of it with me. Every time Jacob would comment on something, you'd stand there, eyeing the article and then finally comment about how it would or wouldn't work with the color scheme that the two of _you_ were discussing was a slap in the face. Even now the realization that Jacob was there with you when _I_ couldn't even talk Sam into considering tagging along was a double slap in the face.

But I suppose I've had my fair share of slaps to the face to last me a lifetime; first imprinting, Sam and then finally you. As I walk around looking at all of the different booths and smile at the passing and familiar faces I think that maybe I should just open a booth myself.

_One dollar to slap Emily Uley in the face! Why? Well because she callously broke her cousin's heart, stole her fiancé and at every chance she gets rubs it in Leah's face that she has Sam Uley now and forever. Step right up! Step right up!_

I let out a sigh as I continue on walking by, shaking my head at an old woman trying to convince me to buy some of her fry bread. I _used_ to run a booth; we both ran one together back when we were little girls. We'd run back and forth in between working your grandmother's booth where she sold her handmade woven blankets and your father's booth where he sold his wood carvings and canoes. One year, the year before Sam's transformation, we both had open and ran our own booth; you made and sold fry bread while I sold muffins. Everybody bought up our food to the point that we had to close down early for the day.

I didn't know it then but you had talked every boy and man that walked up to our booth into buy my muffins. None of them really saw the 'cultural' point of having muffins at an event that was meant to celebrate tribe and Native American pride. The truth came to me my first year of being with Sam; I'd put in my request for the booth, Sam and the boys had all helped me out, carrying everything over and even the other imprints had helped me bake. However, Kim and Rachel didn't seem too excited about the idea and the day of Rachel had tried to 'suggest' that I sale some fry bread as well. The problem is that I've _never_ been able to make good fry bread. I don't know why; it's just a – it's like a curse.

But I had brushed her off saying that everything would be fine.

I wish I hadn't because my booth was a complete bust. A few people bought the muffins but with so many other things around it just didn't seem necessary to eat blueberry muffins. William Mason, a crude and extremist in tribe pride, had called me a 'red Martha Stewart sale out'. He and Sam had choice words after that comment but at that point the damage had already been done.

Sam had tried to get the boys to buy my muffins but the problem was that _none_ of them had any money. Besides it was just easier and cheaper if they waited around for the end of the day and then gorged themselves on my muffins for free.

I hear a laugh that causes me to stop in my steps and as I look around I suddenly realize that I've wandered over into the arts-n-craft section. The laughter is so light, carefree and reminds me of good days gone – long gone. It's _you_; you're standing underneath a sheltered booth, one hand resting on your hip and the other planted firmly on the table. You're wearing a simple pair of jeans and a dark green tank top and the way you're leaning forward towards the boy before you I know that you're haggling with him.

My eyes can't help but widen at the realization that _you've_ opened up a booth this year; you've not worked a booth since – since your father died. You and the boy stand going back and forth talking about a small wooden sculpture of a wolf. He's trying to get you to lower the price but you're remaining steadfast. I move closer towards your booth and it looks like you've got the largest booth this year.

The walls are lined with paintings and the tables filled with everything from bracelets, earrings, rings and wooden figurines and sculptures; there's even a pair of canoes in the far back hanging up on a make-shift wall. My eyes widen at everything; everything that you and your boys have made.

"Hey Emily." I look up from an intricate bracelet made of string and beads to see Jacob standing on the other side of the table. He gives me a weak smile and I return one of my own.

Things are strained between me and the rest of your pack; Jacob especially. Neither of us really knows how to address the other because you and I aren't exactly on the best of terms yet. Polite, formal and the usual every day conversations have become the extent of our interactions; a 'hey' or 'hello' followed up with an awkward 'how are you?' and 'good' back.

"Interested in buying?" Jacob asks nodding his head down at the bracelet in my hand. I look down at it, up at him and over at you. "She didn't make it, I did." Jacob answers the question that was hanging in my head.

"Oh," I say before looking around. You've always been very good with your hands; creating beautiful pieces of work since you were 4. According to Harry, it's always been a natural talent you have to take the simplest thing and make it into something more; something beautiful and worthwhile.

"She didn't make a whole lot of bracelets this year." Jacob says pulling my attention back in. I notice his dark side glance as he looks back over at you, now teasing the boy as he stands blushing.

"It's a secret talent of hers." I whisper to Jacob with a small smile.

"Yea, believe me _I know_." Jacob admits as he shakes his head and you reach over and lightly touch the boy's arm. "And she's closed the deal." He grumbles as the boy nods his head and reaches into his back pocket pulling out his wallet.

"She's been doing that since she was 7," I say continuing our conversation. "She's always talked people into buying her wares using her big brown eyes, her sweet smile and eventually," I begin but stop as I hear a low growl. Looking up I notice Jacob glaring at me darkly, there's a warning his gaze and I look down and hang my head in shame. Without realizing it I must've sounded very spiteful about your tactics.

A part of me can't help but resent Leah's easy nature and her ability to just _lure_ people towards her. Even Harry used Leah to sell his goods; it was hard for people to say 'no' to the adorable little girl with the big, soft brown eyes, the small button nose, that sweet and contagious smile. Because of Leah's ties through Sue to the Makahs, Harry was able to sell canoes to them as well by simply telling them that Leah had helped make it. Leah's both Quileute and Makah giving her a tie to both tribes; she's everyone's daughter, sister and friend.

"Not working this year?" Jacob asks shaking his head and clearing the growl out of his throat. I shake my head 'no' and I know that I've hit the limit to our conversation. I silently berate myself as Jacob lets out a heavy sigh and frowns over at you, you're finishing up with the boy and wave him good bye.

"Sold your wolf for fifteen bucks." You declare proudly as you tuck your hands into the apron you have around your waist. "Emily," You greet with a nod of your head. I open my mouth to give my greeting back but someone beats me to it.

"Leah? Leah Clearwater?" A deep voice calls out. We all turn around and even though I can't see your face, I know your eyes light up and a huge smile breaks out across your face as you walk up and hug the man. He's about your height, maybe a few inches taller than you, but he's white, with sandy brown hair, light green eyes and even with the simple t-shirt and jeans I can tell he works out.

Sam walks up and stands beside me as you and the man comment on one another's looks and presence. I suddenly feel small as Jacob and Sam both turn to face this new man that has garnered so much of your attention; both of their arms crossed tightly across their chests, both their jaws squared and I'm certain teeth clenched.

"Aaron I can't believe it's you." You say as you shake his shoulders lightly and laughing. "I've missed you!"

"Can't believe me? I can't believe you!" Aaron throws back, his hands resting on your waist. It looks awkward with a table in between the two of you but it also looks very natural. "You have _no_ idea how much I've missed you. It's been what? Two years?"

"I know, at least." You throw out.

Another man shows up, this one much older than Aaron but with the same light green eyes as his hair is a salt and pepper color.

"Dad, look who I found." Aaron says throwing his father a quick glance before turning back to you.

"Mr. Gene!" Leah cries and wraps her arms around his neck and gives him a big hug.

Gene and Aaron Hayworth are regulars to the Quileute Days and any other tribal event going on in the Olympic Peninsula. The story is that Gene has ties to the Quileute tribe through a grandmother who remarried, after her husband died, a pale face. Leah has known these two since she was 3-years old as they've always frequented Harry's booth buying up his figures, bracelets and eventually Leah's paintings.

Turns out the two of them have been out east; Aaron working on his masters in art history and Gene was dealing with the passing of his wife, she died of breast cancer a year ago. The three catch up like old friends and I feel myself tearing up as you tell them about Harry; Gene even sheds a tear at the news and Aaron gives you a hug. He must whisper something to you a little too personal or intimate because both Jacob and Sam growl.

"We've missed an awful lot then, huh?" Gene asks as the two of you both wipe away tears. "But I'm glad to see that you've managed to pick up where he left off." Gene says with a proud smile.

"Yea, we've fallen behind in our tribal art and have a _lot_ of catching up to do." Aaron adds giving you a wink.

Gene and Aaron have always been the biggest spenders at these kinds of events. Gene being a retired stock broker and supposedly coming from a wealthy family anyway they just have money to spend; and they _always_ spend the majority of it at the Clearwater booth.

With a nod you turn and usher them to the back of the stand where there are a few paintings and wooden sculptures. Aaron pauses for a moment and looks at the small group of us that have been watching his interactions with you closely. He looks from each of us with an appraising eye and I feel insulted when he gives me a cold, disgusted and disapproving glare. Sam wraps his arm around me and that only seems to make Aaron smirk as there is an 'I knew it' look to his face. Aaron, obviously, recognizes Sam as he and Leah dated the last few years he was here. His glare makes me feel ashamed and I find myself unable to meet his eyes any longer.

"I wasn't sure if you two were going to show up this year." You say with a huge smile on your face. "I missed you the year Daddy passed away."

"Yea, no one had said that he died. Just that you were all going through some 'trials' and didn't have a booth." Gene says softly as part of the truth hits him again.

"Yea, but in that time I've had a lot of time to think and I've got something _especially_ for you, Mr. Gene." You say proudly.

At this point a small crowd has gathered around to see what Leah has for her two favorite customers. It's been years since Leah participated in Quileute Days; if Sam was the Golden Boy of La Push because of his strong loyalties and pride in his heritage; it's only fitting that _his_ girl be the same way. Leah was undoubtedly the Golden Girl as she could dance, sing, cook, craft and sculpt for the celebrations. Leah has always had at least two hands into some activity going on and her absence, since her and Sam's break up, was noticed and greatly missed.

Although she's not dancing, singing or cooking this year there is still a high energy in the air over what she could've made. Every vendor knows that you keep your absolute best work hidden in the back to keep common eyes from tainting it.

In the back, you show them figures of wolves running; Jacob chuckles at the irony as that is what most of your work seems to consist of. Gene and Aaron carry the pieces to the front to get a better look at them in the sunlight. I've never been the 'artsy' type of person but I can see the time, detailing and effort that went into each piece. The fine lines marking the fur, the intricate shaving to make the teeth and the care that went into each expressive eye.

It's easy for me to pick out Seth, Embry, Quil, Jake and even Paul among the pieces. You've managed to capture a part of their personality in each one. Wolves maybe clichéd for Native Americans, like buffalos and totems, but everyone gathers around to awe and marvel at the near life-like wolves. Some running, others fighting and there's even one howling with its head thrown back.

Aaron and Gene find themselves at a loss over which ones they want to purchase; and as they debate there are others who are making bids for the pieces that aren't getting that much attention from the pair.

Somehow everyone that wants a sculpture seems to work out an agreement with Gene and Aaron leaving every sculpture crafted by hands – sold.

"Alright, what about paintings? Do you have any this year?" Aaron asks as Quil and Embry work on wrapping up and distributing the pieces sold. The crowd has gotten bigger since Gene and Aaron's first arrival and it seems that word has gotten around that Leah is unveiling the work from her 'hiatus'.

You quickly nod your head and Jacob moves to help you bring the paintings forward. I'm amazed at how much you have to sell this year; you've already sold 17 wooden wolf statues. Is all of _this_ really the culmination of the last 2-years?

You unveil your paintings and they captivate people even more than your wolves did. Your paintings are of some wolves but there are also beautiful landscapes from around the peninsula. There's even a painting of _all_ the Elders surrounding a bonfire. I'm amazed at how you've managed to bring our every day lives and activities to life with just oil, paint and a canvas.

Gene automatically falls in love with every painting that you show but Aaron seems to hold back; his interest not really piquing to just _one_. I think Aaron loses his brownie points with Jacob as he casually picks up your sketchbook and begins flipping through it. You _never_ let just _anyone_ look through it but you seem perfectly fine with it as you stand next to him waiting for his response.

"I want this one," Aaron says finally settling on a page and pointing to a sketch that I can't see.

You look down at it, a small frown forming your face, before you nod your head and walk towards the truck that is parked out back. You soon return, Seth in tow, carrying a few more covered canvasses.

An easel has been set up to hold up each of the paintings allowing everyone a chance to look and appraise each work at their leisure. You hand Aaron a fairly large canvas and he gives you a questioning look as if asking if you're okay with this particular one being displayed. You nod your head and he sets it up and carefully begins to unwrap it. It's a painting of _you_. You're naked in the photo but you're sitting just so with your knees bent and legs crossed that it's not only beautiful but tasteful. But what really capture me are your eyes. In your eyes there is just so much hurt, pain and sorrow in them. There is a small frown on your face as your head is tilted so that it's resting on your forearm, your, what used to be, long black hair has been pulled to one side hanging over your left shoulder and your right hand is lightly toying with a purple flower.

In the painting you look so small, vulnerable and sad that it breaks my heart; yet there's also an underlying strength in them that seems defiant.

From there more and more emotional and meaningful paintings are pulled out and with each one I get a glimpse into your soul, who you are, what you've been through and every step deeper and deeper I begin to feel sick to my stomach because _I'm_ partly to blame for this.

Not all of the paintings are just about pain but some even of your healing. Aaron frowns and casts a hard look at Jacob before turning back to the painting. It's of you and Jacob in a moment just before an embrace. It's intimate and so personal because you're both naked or at least from the small of your back up you are. Your back is to the viewer, with your head turned to the side, giving a view of your profile. There is a far off gaze in your eye and it's obvious that you're trying to avoid Jacob's. Jacob stands in front of you, part of his body hidden behind your form, his eyes looking down intently trying to get you to meet his gaze, a firm hand gently cupping your face.

Aaron agrees to buy _all_ of your paintings and looks like he even puts in a few requests for some of uncompleted sketches in your book. Details are worked out on how to get everything that they've purchased from the rez back to their home in Seattle. You're more than pleased about the turn of events as there is now a perpetual smile across your face every time I see you turn.

"I've got something _extra_ special for you, Mr. Gene." You call as out almost as if what you have is important and much needed. "This is what I _really_ wanted you to see."

You pick up a huge box and all eyes widen and there's a collective gasp that ushers throughout the crammed area as you reveal a wooden bust of Harry. It's a perfect likeness of your father from his sage and loving eyes and even down to the fine wrinkles that had started to appear the last few months of his life. The bust, although made of wood, seems to breathe and the hair, finely detailed, looks as if it could blow in the breeze that has picked up.

"It's made of redwood," You begin to explain and your voice wavers and cracks as your eyes shine with unshed tears and pride. The bust makes you very emotional and as I chance a look around it makes the older people emotional as well. "The head is one whole piece, the neck and shoulders had to be made separately." I look at you, Leah, as you continue explaining how much you put into it, the tools used to carve out the details and how long it's taken you.

This is a piece that has taken you 2-years to complete. Gene and Aaron are not only touched by the piece of art but are rendered speechless by it. Looking up at you I'm confused for a moment because I _don't_ recognize you. You're _not_ the angry, bitter, hurt and spiteful spirit warrior that mocked, insulted and spurned me your senior year in high school. You're not even the girl, best friend or cousin that I've loved for what seems like forever.

You, Leah Michelle Clearwater, have become a completely different person to me in this moment. In this moment, I realize that I know nothing, truly, about the woman before me. The woman before me is strong, beautiful, talented, emotional, warm-hearted and loving. This is a woman who only wishes to surround herself with those that she _love_ and who love her back. Pain, although unavoidable, she's ready to accept and, right now, embrace with open arms.

Long gone is my cousin that would fight my battles for me, that'd sweet talk any boy into buying my muffins, the cousin that loved Sam Uley with all her heart that when he, _we_ broke it there was nothing left but a cold husk.

"It's – it's beautiful, Leah." Gene breathes out.

"It looks just like Harry." Aaron adds as he kneels down and looks into the face of a man that hasn't been seen in over 3-years.

"I know, I missed him so much," Leah admits with a nod. "There was just so _much_ going on around the time that he died," She pauses as she swallows the emotional lump in her throat. "I was – I was afraid that I'd lose my memories; I had lost so much so soon." I suddenly feel eyes boring into my back and the back of my head as I tense at her words, the hurt and pain in her voice; the _truth_ of Leah's situation at the time.

"Oh, Leah, it's amazing but _we_ can't take this – it belongs to," Gene begins but is cut off as Leah quickly shakes her head.

"No, I made this for _you_." Leah says adamantly. "There are two others; one of my own and one for my mother. You always joked about how we never did much with people,"

"Harry said it was because a human figure would have to hold some significant value; it just couldn't be of some random person." Aaron fills in for her. "What's a human without a,"

"Soul." Leah finishes. "I thought I had lost mine and what little I _thought_ I had left was put into this one. When I finished them, _all_ of them, I knew there were only so few people that I'd want to give it to. So…this is my gift to you for always believing in me." Leah says and she looks down at the ground.

For some reason, Gene moves Leah away, out of earshot for us normal humans, but I'm certain that every wolf present can hear exactly what is being said. Whatever Gene is saying to Leah must really touch her because she hugs him, holds onto him with all her might as he tells her something while stroking her back.

"You're a _real_ lucky guy," Aaron says seriously standing up and giving Jacob a hard glare. "You better take _excellent_ care of her."

"Believe me, I know and I wouldn't ever_ dream_ of hurting her." Jacob states back looking back at Aaron.

"You won't be so lucky to still see her everyday if you do." Aaron adds with a hard frown before replacing it with a smile as Leah walks up to him and into his arms for an embrace. The comment catches all of us off guard and to prove a point Aaron promises Leah that he'll always be there for her if she needs him; _after_ congratulating her on the engagement.

I eventually move on, dragging Sam with me and decide to see what else Quileute Days have to offer us. I find myself at a loss of what to do and make of this new realization that I've come across. How do you become friends again with someone that you've hurt the most and in the worst possible way? Is it possible for me to connect with this new Leah in some way? As I look up at Sam I can't help but wonder if he's thinking the same thing as me? At one point the two of us were Leah's closest friends…and now? Now she'd much rather show the whole world her most vulnerable moments then confide in either of us.

_Step right up. Hurry! Hurry! Come and deliver a slap in the face to Emily Uley. Say that Leah Clearwater sent you and get two slaps for the price of one_.

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A/N: So this idea has been rattling around in my head for a few weeks now and I was finally able to get it out. I've been dealing with a problem for the last week or so now and I've told only a few people but I think I'm going to just put it out there – I believe I've hit my angst plateau. What does this mean? Well it means that Kei is pulling away from all of her dark and angst-ridden stories for the moment.

*sniffles* This really may affect…Decision, First Come Love, Leah's Propaganda, Redemption, **Wake-up Call** and Worth Waiting For; as these stories deal with a lot of angry, disappointment, resentment, jealousy, envy and whatever kind of negativity I can work in there.

But, of course, everyone's top concern is Wake-up Call. I have an idea of how the story will work out but the emotions and descriptions I put into it helps keep it on track. This story originally came to me back in Tokyo as I was forced to share a single bed with my Mum who loves to grit her teeth in her sleep, mumble and roll over on top of me. So…yea, I wasn't in a good place or good mood during that time.

I DO have part of the next chapter for Wake-up Call typed up and I'm going to try and expound on it more since I wound up breaking it up in the last chapter. I just don't want to short change my own ideal and you guys in the story by sudden lethargy and mental laziness.

I'm not done with writing altogether and especially not Blackwater but I might need to do something a bit more light-hearted before getting back into the heavier and more negative emotions again. I do plan on wrapping up Redemption soon as I've worked out a loophole to deal with my own personal issues here. But than again someone could post like a truly delicious and heart wrenching angst story that could get the juices flowing. Just that right now for the last 6-months I've been reading nothing but stories that anger, frustrate and annoy me; I'm just weary of them and have moved onto something light and with a bit more intrigue oh Alexandre Dumas's Viscount de Bragelonne you will not let me down. *hugs book and sighs*

Oh! And I just have to share this with you guys because it had me cracking up like an idiot in my car. Yesterday, after posting, Squirrel Love I pick my niece up from pre-school and on our way back home a cop car speeds past us, no lights or sirens, and so I just ignore it and go on. But like 60-ft down the street the cops just sped away from was a dead squirrel lying in the middle of the road. Seeing that squirrel just had me into tears thinking about that story and now my niece thinks her Addie crazy. LOL. Oh, good times. Good times.

Alright, so you all know what to do. You can make my day by reviewing or you can be just totally and completely selfish by not saying anything about the story or the update whatsoever. T-T I just poured my heart and soul (partly) out to you guys and gals so the least you can do is give me a response back. If you don't well…*sighs* that's fine but 'shame on you'!


	9. Quileute Days cont'd

Quileute Days cont'd

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**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters and again nor did I create Quileute Days as it is a series of events held to celebrate their culture. **

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It's the annual La Push Quileute Days celebration. It's one of many celebrations where all the tribes come together and celebrate our culture and heritage. This year I'm working on set up and will make sure that everyone with a booth will have everything that they will need. I've already pitched a tent for me and Emily in one of the campgrounds; I'll admit that I smiled smugly as Jacob growled in frustration when he saw that I already claimed the best spot.

I will admit that I am worried now because I have no idea where _you_ will be staying; I just hope that you're not sharing a tent with Jacob. I growl at the idea of you, my Lee-Lee, sharing a sleeping bag with that _cub_. No matter how many times I see it, I can never get over seeing Jacob Black's hands holding, caressing and touching you, seeing his lips kiss yours over and over and _over again_. Even the way he stands beside you with an air of aggressive possessiveness letting everyone know that _you_ belong to him.

"Huh? So Leah's opening a booth this year?" Jared comments and at the news I come out of my thoughts, dropping everything that I'm doing and walk over towards Jared. Snatching the board from his hands I check the layout and I see 'Clearwater' on the sheet of paper before me.

I don't know what drives me but I head over to the area of the map. The larger booths were already set up by Mason and his brothers earlier in the week. I quickly make my way over to the arts-n-craft area and I freeze upon seeing you standing before the booth, the booth that bares the old 'Clearwater' sign that your father has used for years. You're standing a few feet back from the front, your hand up shielding your eyes from the early morning rays of the sun, the light making your olive colored skin positively glow and radiate with beauty and warmth.

You're directing Quil and Seth on how to hand your sign; my eyes drink in your body as you're wearing just an old tank top, a tiny pair of shorts and flip flops. You must've just finish running your patrol as there is a slight hint of Cullen stench hanging in the air. But it does nothing to ease my Lee-Lee watching as you stand with a hand resting on your hip, the same hip angled out, making the dip in your waistline more prominent.

"That's perfect!" You say with a huge smile on your face. I look around and notice that none of the booths in this area have been set up with lights and electricity yet. Taking a deep breath I walk up towards you as Quil and Seth move around to the back of the booth; it means I'll have you alone for a few minutes.

"Morning Lee-Le-ah," I greet trying to correct my mistake. You fix me with a hard frown at my slip up but choose not to address it; maybe it's because I stopped myself? "You're opening a booth this year?" I ask and immediately feel stupid for asking because there's a HUGE sign before us with your last name on it and only those running booths would bother to show up so early.

"Uh…yea," You answer with a slow nod of your head.

"Well…uh, if you need any help or _anything_, anything at all; don't hesitate to ask me." I say hopefully with a huge smile on my face. It's funny but standing here with you reminds me of the days when _you_ were the only girl for me and we'd talk, flirt and joke early in the morning before separating to work. We almost made time to meet up with one another, hang out, and then we'd walk around together hand-in-hand and then slip away for a heated make-out session.

"Well…uh, thanks…for that Sam." You answer awkwardly, your brow furrowing and a frown appearing on your beautiful face. My shoulders slump because there was a time when my presence _always_ put a smile on your face.

"I think we can handle anything that comes up." My muscles tense as _Jacob's_ voice cuts through the silence. You smile at _him_ as he walks up and wraps an arm around your waist, the challenge prominent in his eyes. The alpha in me wants to challenge Jacob so badly; it wants the absolute title of alpha and the rights to you as a mate but the imprint pulls on me and I look away.

"Well…I'll be back in a couple of hours to set up the lights and strip down the cables and cords. Just don't hang anything up on the back wall until we're done." I order sternly before turning and storming away.

_I hate that cub_.

I can't even begin to understand how you could even _agree_ to – to marry _him_. But I go on with the rest of my day, preparing the booths for the festival and fixing up any loose odds and ends. All of the preparations go by fast and the beginning of the celebration is upon us.

Walking in around and taking in all of the sights; my pack are all enjoying themselves, walking around with their imprints and the others flirting with the girls. It is as I'm walking past a booth serving food that I see _him_, a man that aggravates me more than Jacob Black, himself. His store bought suntan, designer brand name clothes, perfectly gelled hair and the _stench_ of money, success, inheritance and life _away_ from the reservation.

_Aaron Hayworth_.

My eyes lock onto his figure as he walks around looking at all the different items in the booths being sold. Everyone _knows_ and recognizes Aaron and his father, Gene, because they are the only 'regular' whites that show up for the festivals without already living on the reservation or around in the immediate area.

You've known Aaron all your life and you've always held some kind of special _bond_ with him. You both have a natural talent and eye for art, I've had to stand aside for years watching the two of you talk, laugh and share…jokes, comments – _something_ that I didn't understand but seemed to involve some secret language only understood by the two of you.

I hate _him_; I've hated him ever since I overheard your mother telling some of her friends that if there was anyone that could get you 'off the rez it'd be that Aaron Hayworth'. I hate him because I've known for a long time that if he was _ever_ allowed to get a hold on your heart in any way possible you'd take his hand, leave the rez and never look back.

As selfish as it sounds I can't bear the thought of not seeing you again, not seeing you every day even if it's just in passing. I'd much rather you be with Jacob Black because at least it'd be a guarantee that you'll stay here in La Push.

I follow him and hope and pray that by some twist of fate that you'll both pass by one another…or that Jacob Black will kick his ass, then be arrested for assault and locked away in jail. Or maybe that they'll both just magically disappear from the face of the earth. I feel my stomach twist into knots as his eyes light up upon seeing the sign bearing your family name and a huge smile spreads across his face as he sees you.

Without a second thought he walks up to you and calls out your name. To my dismay, your worthless _fiancé_, Jacob Black, allows you to hug Aaron and even stand aside as his hands linger on your body. I walk up and notice that Emily is standing next to Jacob. I look on as Aaron and his father talk to Leah, catching up with one another and finding out about what's been going on in each other's lives.

_Aaron_ has been out east working on his _Masters_ in Art History at _Harvard_. My eyes narrow as I watch your face closely to see if you're impressed – you are. You're not only impressed but proud of him. You hold _his_ hand as Gene tells you of his wife's passing and he holds _you_ as you tell him about Harry.

"I wish you would've told me, Leah. _I_ would've been here for you." Aaron whispers into your ear and the comment has both me and Jacob growling in anger. Out the corner of my eye I notice Jacob squaring up his shoulders but before he can let his anger take hold, he begins to take deep calming breathes. Aaron's comment is only further reminder of how much _he_ wants you and would take you away from me if given the chance.

"You're right." You whisper back and I feel the fight taken out of me with that little comment. Would you have called Aaron if I hadn't forbidden you from talking to the regular people in your life? Did I take that command much too far? You were supposed to confide, trust and believe in your pack mates, in Emily and most of all in _me_. Why do you feel and make it sound as if _I_, we, weren't enough for you, Lee-Lee?

Your intimate interactions with Aaron are over as you head to the back of your booth to show off the work that you've done. My stomach clenches because you've _always_ made something special for both Gene and _Aaron_. I watch you go but my attention is drawn back to the front as Aaron stands giving each of us an appraising eye; it's the looks that he places on me _and_ Emily that has me wrapping an arm around her, protectively. I don't like the dark look that he is giving us and the moment I hold Emily close does he have this smug look about him.

"_I can't believe she's convinced herself that she loves _you_." Aaron's voice rings out behind me as I'm standing watching Lee-Lee play softball. I turn around at his voice and I can see the angry, disapproving and jealous look upon his face. _

_I can only smile smugly at him realizing there's nothing I have to say to _him_ because Lee-Lee has already done it. His money can't buy her; the promise of an easy life married to a kid with a huge inheritance isn't enough for _my_ girl, _my_ Lee-Lee. _

"_You just better make sure that you take care of her and really _love_ her. She deserves so much more than the likes of _you_ and we both know it." Aaron growls out, his hands clenched into tight fists. _

"_Or else what?" I ask with a frown on my face and my arms crossed. "You're gonna fight me or sumtin? You don't know the first thing about fighting; you're just a spoiled rich kid. Lee-Lee is nothing to you but a hot piece of exotic ass you can show off to all your other spoiled rich buddies and get free art off of." My comment incenses Aaron as his nostrils flare and his eyes darken._

"_What 'hot piece of exotic ass'? Is that really how _you_ see her to have come up with that response so quickly?" Aaron asks and I find myself suddenly the one stunned. "Leah deserves to have everything she could ever want and wish for. She _deserves_ someone willing to give it to her, willing to fight for her and stand beside her." He begins to ramble off as his eyes drift over to Lee-Lee and soften the moment they rest on her. "I love and respect her too much to tell her she's wasting her time with _you_ but I'll wait," Aaron says turning his attention back to me. "I'll wait for _when_ you fuck up and I'll take her far away from here, away from the pain and most importantly of all away from _you_." _

I never got to tell Aaron that he would be waiting for eternity or that I'd break his pretty-boy face if he ever thought of taking Lee-Lee away from me but he had already walked away leaving me flustered and angered. I understand what that smug look upon his face means –

_He was right_.

The realization is like a punch to the gut and I find myself feeling sick and winded; he was right. How could he have been right? How did he know that I'd break your heart? Everything that he said Lee-Lee deserved I was unable to do; I couldn't give her everything that she wanted. When I imprinted I didn't even fight to stay with her and instead of sticking with her, standing by her side I left her cold, alone, heartbroken and feeling used just so I could stand next to her cousin.

_Aaron Hayworth was right about it all_.

I look up to find Aaron and Gene looking over many pieces of works, most of them wolves; pack mates. My eyes widen slightly as I see a beautiful woman before me showing off and talking about each piece of work proudly and confidently. I'm surprised for a moment because this isn't _my_ Lee-Lee standing and nervously talking about her work. My Lee-Lee always loved working with her hands but when it came time to show it off, she was anxious, worried and suddenly felt self-conscious about the work on display. She wasn't sure if people would actually like her work or even think it was good enough to purchase. A shyness about her that makes her not only vulnerable but adorable as well.

This isn't even the Leah, the she-wolf and brokenhearted Lee-Lee that entered my pack. There is no air of superiority to her face, no biting comments or remarks showing an over confidence that is both infuriating and sexy. There is no mistrust in her eyes and her stance isn't that of one who is ready to run at the slightest harsh word or even throw out harsh, rude and crude comments back with that sharp tongue of hers.

This is the woman that has been born from the fire and ashes of that spiteful and broken hearted girl. Is this the woman that Aaron has always seen lying just underneath the surface, the _real_ Leah Clearwater that doesn't need a Sam Uley in her life to get through her day, a woman that doesn't need her fiancé-stealing best friend to stand with her, offering her apologies and muffins. I look to Jacob as he stands back proudly, his eyes observing Leah carefully as she works and only stepping up when help is needed.

You never needed someone to carry you along the road of life, to always hold your hand and be there telling you what to do. I've always needed someone who I can look out for and over, someone to protect and always encourage _me_. The realization hits me – I didn't imprint because you weren't good enough for me but because I really wasn't good enough for you. Emily is everything I needed to become the alpha of the pack until Jacob is ready to take over. I know there is no way I could've put up with you undermining and challenging every my decision. I can't handle having to feel as if I always need to second guess myself but…but that's what Jacob can deal with.

I look over at Jacob and realize that he is just what you – Leah Clearwater needs. Gone is the girl I loved since I was a kid and promised to love forever as a foolish teenager. _This_ Leah Clearwater and Jacob Black are right for each other, they both know how and when to carry the other, when to let the other walk on their own, stand on their own and be their own person. In our meetings together you don't always agree with Jacob, I always enjoyed watching you second guessing him, and I realize that over time Jacob's insecurity about your opposition has changed into careful consideration.

This isn't my Lee-Lee and right now I'm not really sure how to refer to you. Through every progression of Leah's life after Harry's death I've continued to hold onto the image and personality of Lee-Lee, _my_ Lee-Lee. Is that why you've hated that nickname I used? Because you are no longer that girl anymore, you've become something and someone more. Someone I don't really know but someone I definitely do want to know. As silly as it may sound I find myself feeling jealous of both Jacob and Aaron because they both have seen the _real_ Leah Clearwater and each have a part of her to call their own.

The proof of this comes in the form of paintings; my Lee-Lee never painted anything for me or _of_ me. This right belongs to Aaron Hayworth, Gene Hayworth and Jacob Black. Paintings of Jacob are all over the works from the wolf sculptures to even the paintings of a stoic russet colored wolf sitting at the cliff near First Beach. I guess I never inspired Leah to do anything creative and it's a painful thought.

The painting that really touches me and I feel jealous rage and possessiveness over is a painting that Aaron puts out on display. It's a painting of Leah right after she learned how to phase back to human; I know this because this is an image that has haunted me for many years now. I had made sure that the only one to see Leah Clearwater naked and _that_ vulnerable would be _me_. She had phased back and just sat in the grass, her legs bent and tucked underneath her chin, shielding her beautiful body from my eyes; eyes that had drank the beauty that was Leah with desperation. The two of us had talked about imprinting, what _really_ happened between me and Emily, her role now as a spirit warrior, the expectations and so on. With each word uttered out of my mouth, those _eyes_, those warm hazel eyes began to harden and steel themselves against me. A wall was being constructed as she sat idly by listening to me, seducing me with her coy inattention to my presence as she toyed with the lone purple flower near her.

It's an image that I've selfishly and stubbornly have held onto wanting to keep it for myself and I know it's slipped out around Leah. I wanted the Leah that was before me; the naked, vulnerable and loving Lee-Lee to return and I tried to show Leah what _I_ wanted to see instead of what she was becoming.

It hurts that Leah is willing to show this picture off to the whole world, share an intimate moment that was meant to remain between the two of us. I feel sick, again, as Aaron agrees to buy the painting and as I look at him, I know there's no way I could beat him in a bidding war. So I resign myself to the idea that every day and every night, Aaron Hayworth will sit and look at a painting of Leah in one of her most tender moments and Jacob will have the real thing.

Everything begins to wind down and as Leah is discussing with Aaron and Gene how to get all of their purchases to their homes, an idea that still angers me because I don't want _Leah_ anywhere near Aaron and I hope Jacob is smart enough to see that. But Leah pulls out something in a box that she 'claims' to have made especially for the two Hayworth men. My eyes widen as I see a wooden bust made of Harry Clearwater, the details in it is amazing and awe-inspiring; it looks so _real_.

It looks so real as Leah stands there opening up her heart, soul and past to not only Aaron, Gene but everyone else within earshot. I had no idea that Leah was working on this while she was _still_ within my pack. I didn't think there were any secrets between us as I searched her mind at every given opportunity; sure all I found was hurt, anger and disgust but…nothing that she had taken up her craft again. I had thought that Leah had given it up completely.

"There was just so _much_ going on around the time that he died," She pauses as she swallows the emotional lump in her throat. "I was – I was afraid that I'd lose my memories; I had lost so much so soon." I feel that familiar sting in my heart at Leah's admission; it's true that she did lose her father, fiancé, her best friend, _all_ of her friends, her life and so much more so quickly. I can admit that I was wrapped into trying to defend La Push, love Emily and run the pack that I – I really didn't pay much attention to everything that Leah felt that she lost. In my eyes, she still had me _and_ Emily; losing a parent is something painful but we've all lost a parent at one time or another. Yet…at the same time those of us who had lost a parent were allowed plenty of time to mourn their loss and receive the right kind of sympathy – everyone but Leah Clearwater.

I hang my head because I realize that I wasn't a strong supporter for her and had put too much on her so soon. I just assumed that because Seth was able to get up and keep moving that Leah would also be able to do the exact same thing. I never really knew Leah Clearwater and maybe she has always been just that perfect kind of girl that could be your best friend and lover.

"I thought I had lost mine and what little I _thought_ I had left was put into this one. When I finished them, _all_ of them, I knew there were only so few people that I'd want to give it to. So…this is my gift to you for always believing in me." Leah says and she looks down at the ground. Again Leah's words cut me deeply; did she really think that no one believed in her? That _I_ didn't trust her and…I sigh because at this point what _I_ intended and what she actually received are two _very_ different things.

After those words, Gene seems to become upset, angry even because he takes Leah's hand and walks her away. He leads her away from the prying eyes and ears of the spectators that are now admiring the bust.

"Leah was things _that_ bad?" Gene asks once he feels that they are far enough away. Leah only nods her head slowly still looking down.

"Like I said my life was just changing so fast and so quickly that _I_ never got a moment alone to stop and think about it. I wasn't allowed the opportunity to deal with it on my own. There were so many people always in my face, in _my_ space and felt like in my head – that it was infuriating. It was maddening. I couldn't just be _me_, you know?" Leah says looking up at Gene with sad, hurt eyes.

"Who ended it, Leah?" Gene asks solemnly. "You or Sam?"

"Sam did," Leah answers truthfully and I find myself curious about what it is that Gene is going to say to her. Is he going to try and talk Leah into leaving with _them_? To marry _his_ son and not worry about this life anymore?

"And that woman next to him is your cousin, Emily, right? The one you used to sell fry bread with." Gene clarifies and again Leah nods her head. "I'm sorry Leah," Gene says giving Leah a tight hug. "I'm sorry that they hurt you like that and that you had to go through all of this alone." Leah clings to him tightly and I can hear her starting to sniffle. "But know this," Gene says with a small smile.

"Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you right. Love the ones who _don't_ just because you can. Believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life, let it." Gene's smile softens as Leah pulls back and looks up at him. "Kiss your true love slowly. Forgive quickly. God never said life would be easy, He just promised it would be worth it. And know that no matter what happens in your life that Aaron and I will both always love you with all of our hearts." I look away as tears begin to fall from Leah's eyes and I'm not sure what happens next as I suddenly feel awkward and out-of-place in Leah's space; maybe it's because I know deep down in my heart that the words just spoken are the words that Leah needed to hear years ago right after she phased. I've done a horrible thing by cutting Leah off from all of those that loved her; I was foolish to think that what Emily and I had to offer her was enough.

"You're a _real_ lucky guy," Aaron says seriously standing up and giving Jacob a hard glare. "You better take _excellent_ care of her." I fix Jacob with one of my own because I agree wholeheartedly with Aaron.

"Believe me, I know and I wouldn't ever_ dream_ of hurting her." Jacob states back looking back at Aaron.

"You won't be so lucky to still see her every day if you do." Aaron adds with a hard frown before replacing it with a smile as Leah walks up to him and into his arms for an embrace. The statement doesn't surprise me really as it's the same threat that he issued to me back when Leah was only 17-yrs old. If Jacob fails there will be no bringing or keeping Leah in La Push after that; she wouldn't think of hesitating in reaching out towards Gene and Aaron because no matter what they'd welcome her with open arms.

I struggle to stick around and act as if all of this hasn't affected me greatly but it seems as if gradually, bit-by-bit, I'm learning so much about Leah Clearwater and myself. It pleases and angers me at the same time to see how much she has grown and how much she's grown without me. I hope that I'll have these emotions worked out by the wedding so that I can enjoy it without feeling angry and resentful. I squeeze Emily's hand as we walk away from a woman that once called us her dearest friends but is now a complete stranger.

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A/N: Alright so here goes the next update to this story. I'm trying to plow through and finish up as many stories as I possibly can and this one is almost done. Just squeeze in one more chapter before the wedding and then a few more about after the honeymoon. Not so much angst as it is about realizations and regrets.

I don't know about you guys but I am in LOVE with Gene and Aaron. ^-^ Gene with his patience, kindness and understanding words of wisdom and Aaron for that no-nonsense attitude when it comes to Leah Clearwater but his ability to respect the decisions that she makes. Plus, saw a guy with the most gorgeous light green eyes at the gym that it made me pause and just stare into them for a few seconds – although it felt longer. Hahaha.

So as _promised_ to Masquerade11 and ellie82 – as these 2 ladies have really been riding me about updating. But I will _not_ work on anything else until I get the next chapter pulled together. Scout's honor! And yea, yea I was a girl scout so it does mean something. LOL. But I hope you all have a great weekend in the meantime.

Up next Ted and Leah: Clash of the Titans! Uh…I'm not calling the chapter that…but…I think I might because I love the sound of it. You've read this far and so now review! Fill up my mailbox and let me know what you think. ^-^


	10. Big News & Big Talk

Big News & Big Talk

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Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters which is cool cuz I really don't EVER want to be associated with believing that Bella Swan is a POSITIVE *gags* role model. The girl was suicidal people!

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Running through the woods I'm grateful that there is no one else around. It's nice not having to worry about putting up a block to keep my thoughts in check. Free to think about anything and everything without someone listening in or asking me if everything is alright. As I'm running to just stretch my legs I pick up a familiar scent – it's sweet, alluring and unique. It's your scent and despite the fact that I've made it a habit to avoid you and Jacob at all costs I still find myself pulled in your direction. Mainly because I do not pick up Jacob's scent anywhere close by. Since your wedding you two have become inseparable, it's as if you've become joined at the hip. And that's saying something considering how you both were before the engagement.

I find you sitting on a fallen log along one of the old trails, alone, with your back towards me and wearing a burgundy hoodie. Quickly I phase and cautiously approach you and call out your name. I'm surprised that you turn around and smile at me – you actually, genuinely and sincerely smiled at me. I can't help the, more than likely, huge, excited and goofy grin that I give back to you and ask if it's alright if I sit down next to you.

I sit down quickly beside you worried that you'll change your mind; snap at me and verbally assault me. Apparently, I sit down so quickly that I misjudge the width of the log and wind up falling backwards. Lying on my back I stare up at the sky and groan internally as I hear your laughter ring out around us. Despite my embarrassment I join in your laughter because it sounds so light, carefree and, again, genuine. To my surprise you reach out a hand and help me back up in a seating position.

"Graceful as ever," You add and suddenly I feel my cheeks begin to prickle and burn. I'm blushing. It's surprising that you still have this kind of effect on me. Emily never makes me blush and maybe it's because I don't feel as self-conscious around her as I do you.

Whenever I'm around you it brings up memories of when we were teenagers. All the picking, teasing and flirting that occurred between us before there was an 'us'. No matter what you'll always be the first female to ever see my cry outside of my mother when I told you about how I hated 'Father's Day'. You hadn't said anything that day but instead you just hugged me. You held me so tightly and made me feel so safe, so secure and warm that I never wanted to let that feeling go – never wanted to let you go.

"How's married life treatin' ya?" I ask looking to break the silence between us. You look at me with a surprised look upon your face and shrug your shoulders.

"I've never been married before but I think it's going pretty good." You answer with a smirk and a glint in your eye.

I won't lie but I tune you out the moment you mention Jacob and just smile at you, nodding my head in the appropriate span of time and chuckling when you do. I can't help but look at your long legs and notice that you're walking around barefoot. The hoodie you're wearing is an old high school hoodie and for a moment I entertain the idea that it's the hoodie I gave you my senior year as the sleeves are much too long for you. You look…cute wearing something oversized. It makes you small, tiny – almost – and fragile.

I wonder if you're still frightened by zombie movies and if you'd try to hide deep within the materials of the hoodie when the hero is startled. I smile because I can remember the pressure of your body, digging and snuggling deep into my side to hide away from the monsters. How afterwards you'd make us sit in the dark and openly debate over whether or not you should sleep with the lights on or off. 'If they're left on it'll draw the zombies but then _I_ won't be able to see them coming', that was the debate that you'd have with yourself.

I can still remember how ecstatic and happy you were when I showed up one day with The Zombie Survival Guide. You danced around, hugging the book and immediately began reading. I laughed at you because the book had succeeded in both calming some of your fears and yet introducing even more. Somehow this simple memory of your fear of zombies leads me down memory lane recalling the survival plan you made me help you pull together, the drills ran through with Seth and Harry, the promises to never leave you behind – and it's small memories like those, all the times I made promises to you only to turn around and break them.

"And so that is why there will be an all pack meeting." You state interrupting my thoughts and bringing me back to the present. My eyes widen as I realize that I've seriously have not been paying attention to a word you've said. "The imprints are invited but it's optional, of course, and we'll understand if she doesn't come." You say standing and stretching. I stare at you wide-eyed in confusion, your hoodie raising up and just barely staying below your ass and I try, _fight_, to recall what you've said.

"Nice talking to you, Sam. See ya around." You greet and you walk away leaving me behind. I know I should call out to you, ask you to repeat that – the whole thing. But I'm afraid that whatever strides we've made in our relationship will be shattered when you hear that I've ignored you, again, and will accuse me of 'being a mindless imprint fuckface' or asshole…asswipe? Maybe spineless was used at one time or another but either way I don't want to be the one to confess it. And instead I sit, alone, on the log and wondering,

_What the hell did she say?_

* * *

I let our 'talk' fade away with the passing days because when Paul mentions the meeting I am not the least bit surprised. There is still that 'imprint optional' offering but it is completely ignored as Kim and Emily both want to see the newlyweds home so badly. I can admit that Jacob's offering to protect the leeches did have an upside in that they gave a huge chunk of cash to build a home for you, your husband and the pack. With the extra money you two were able to hire people from the rez to help build the house – my pack included. It was great having a job that paid well, hanging out with my old high school buddies and the rest of the men that we usually don't interact with because it's safer to stay away. Or at least so I thought because there were no mishaps and even though Paul lost his temper once or twice during the job, a week, there was no near-call phasing. Maybe Jacob was right in that I worried too much and should trust the pack more.

Gathering up Emily we head over to your house and she is practically bouncing along the way. It'll be the first time she's been inside your home and will have been able to talk to you since the last Quileute Days. I can't help but smile at Emily's wide-eyed expression as we walk into the house. It's not the small, quaint little cottage that you always wanted but is big enough for a pack of wolves, much to your frustration I'm sure.

We are thrown a quick greeting and grab a loveseat to share between us. You're sitting on a huge couch in between Quil and Embry with a deep frown upon your face. You have a death grip on the pillow in your lap and I can hear the low growl of annoyance rumbling from your throat. It seems that we've walked in on the middle of a conversation.

"Just shut it, you two." You growl in warning as your shoulders tighten.

"Oh, c'mon, we can't help it." Embry teases with a laugh wrapping his arm around your shoulders.

"I mean they are huge." Quil adds and I raise an eyebrow noticing how he's looking down your tank top. I frown and choke back my own growl but in all fairness…your tits are huge. I find myself staring at them too and wonder when did they get so big and why? Shaking my head I only brush it off as you just wearing a tank that is just too small which isn't new because it happened once when you were in my pack and Seth had tried his hand at laundry.

Everyone sits around talking, joking and even a few arguments break out but it's nothing serious. This gathering of the whole pack, the sense of feeling whole and complete reminds of the days when we all stayed over at the Cullens while Jacob was being healed. A part of me hates to admit it but I miss this and it wouldn't have had to be like this if I had only stepped down and accepted Jacob's decision to protect Bella. But, his decision to choose Bella over everyone is something that I still cannot morally accept.

"Alright, let's get his meeting started." Jacob says drawing everyone's attention. He had slipped in while Seth and Collin were busy arguing about some girl that they both like but is flirting with both of them. Leah had snapped that the girl was dicking them both around and that they should quit giving her so much attention – I'm certain that the image of Bella Swan had popped up in her head when offering the advice which I'm sure that Seth will follow as she is now the Alpha Female over him.

We all quiet down and Jacob starts talking about how that now the Cullens have moved on, there's a quick uproar of cheers and howls, yours truly is included. Jacob and I have already discussed some about what the meeting is about – recombining the packs. There aren't too many secrets between us wolves and so no one is too surprised by the request. I'm pretty certain that Paul is the one that has let it slip to my pack and it doesn't seem as if too much 'pack related' news is kept from Seth, Quil and Embry.

"So me and Sam,"

"Sam and I," Rachel interrupts with a smug smirk causing Jacob to pause and glare at her with his tongue in his cheek before continuing on.

"So Sam and _I_ both agree that this is what will be best for everyone. Not only will it mean more wolves to split patrol between but we'll be better able to protect the rez, Forks and Makah." There are a few nods and verbal agreements because just having the five more bodies means that someone will get another day off from patrolling.

"Oh! Let's get to the juicy part of this meeting." Rachel says dismissively and moves to sit on the edge of her chair.

I can see the mischievous glint in Rachel's eyes as you and Jacob both glare at her. I can't help but feel confused about what the 'juicy' part could be.

"It has been killing you, hasn't it?" You ask with a small chuckle as Rachel shakes her head.

"It's not even _your_ news to tell." Jacob grumbles.

"Whatever," Rachel grumbles.

"Leah's pregnant!" Sue exclaims cutting off the siblings and only now have I become aware of the brightness in her eyes, the fact that she's been bouncing her knee excitedly throughout the meeting and that she and Billy both have been smiling like the cat that ate the canary.

The room comes to life with the excitement over the news for mixed reasons: (1) nobody believing that Leah could get pregnant and (2) that this will be the first child born to any of the wolves. With a roll of your eyes you remove the pillow from your stomach and reveal to all present your swollen belly. Your tits weren't huge just because your shirt was too small but because they are swelling. You sit embarrassed as the cubs quickly jump up to get a closer look at your stomach; it's so full that your tank barely covers your bellybutton.

I sit frozen to my spot on the loveseat as realization hits me that _this_ is what you were referring to the last time we talked. That you wore that oversized hoodie not just because it was the only clean thing available but to hide your stomach. Most importantly of all, _why_ the meeting was optional for imprints. Out of the corner of my eye I look down at Emily to see her sitting stiffly beside me, her hands balled up into tiny fists and her eyes filled with unshed tears.

"Leah won't be patrolling, will she?" One of the cubs asks looking over Leah's shoulder and down at her stomach.

"No, idiot, there's no telling what that might do to the baby." Someone growls at him.

I can feel my insides churning looking at Emily, looking at you. For once I'm at a loss of how to comfort my imprint as she quickly stands up, her hands clenched into tight fists and her jaw locked.

"Congratulations Leah," She forces out and turns disappearing towards the kitchen. A heavy silence falls upon the room as everyone looks from you back to the kitchen and back to you, again, before finally looking at me. You're giving me a cold, hard death glare that has me shivering because you had told me to let Emily know, give her time to think over the news and decide whether or not she would be ready to hear it.

Getting up I follow after Emily into the kitchen to find her standing over the sink. Her shoulders are tense and shaking slightly. All I can do is walk up behind her and wrap her up in my arms. I feel my heart break as she turns around in my arms and starts crying. She's crying because over two years ago she was pregnant and we had the same big announcement. She lost the baby three months after a stumble down some stairs. It was a heavy blow to everyone but no one more than Emily who felt as if she'd let the entire tribe down. We've not had any luck since then.

I try to calm Emily down by shushing her, rubbing her back and letting her know that everything is okay and will be okay. I want to reassure her, comfort her but can't help but find the situation ironic because when we made the announcement you didn't think you could have children. Emily had wanted to share the news with you so badly but I didn't trust you around her to tell her face-to-face so instead we sprung the news on you. You reacted very much the same way and it was brushed off by the pack as you 'just being a bitch' – do they all think that it's my Emily that's being the bitch now?

"It's not fair," I tense as I hear Emily's hiccups out holding onto me tightly. Her words are a haunting echo of your own and I'm not sure that anything I can will ease the pain. Hearing a deep growl I look back to see you and Jacob standing behind me. Judging by the tense and angered look upon Jacob's face I know it was him that growled while you stand looking down at the kitchen floor with a small frown.

"Emily," You huff out and I can see the hard and determined look in your eyes. Instinctively I hold Emily closer as she tenses up upon hearing your face, possibly fearing that you've heard her words, and feel the need to get her as far away from here as possible. To my surprise Emily quickly wipes away her face and glares at Leah with a deep frown. I've not seen Emily look this upset before and in this moment I can see the same cold, hard eyes that you once held when looking at me and Emily, the happy couple, the perfect pair who were getting ready to start their perfect lives together.

"I meant it." Emily says narrowing her eyes at Leah. And the only thought that is running through my head at the moment is:

_Ah shit._

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A/N: Alright, so this is a LONG overdue update. *ignores grumbling about other stories* But I did manage to get this one typed up and…*sighs* then just let it sit in my emails for a week. -_-; I was supposed to proof this but didn't do that either. I do have about 1/3 of the next chapter of Wake-up Call done. YAY! So just be patient with me while I make sure that I do have the right emotions played out and get everything that I picture in my head down into words.

I can gladly say that _this_ story is about done. =D I'm about to have a multi-chaptered story complete! W00T! And it'll be one less thing on my plate and I will wake up in the morning and say, "Yes, yes you did follow through on something. Eat a cinnabun." I probably won't eat a cinnabun because then that'll mean more time on the bike and elliptical but you all get me.

I am hoping to either update Wake-up Call this weekend or afterwards and that is because I'M GOING TO VEGAS! WOOHOO! And for some reason being on vacation always inspires me to write. ^-^ But speaking of vacations, inspiration and Wake-up Call which was started almost a year ago while on vacation in Japan I just want to put it out there that if you can help, please do. I've been donating and even taking a trip down memory lane. I absolutely LOVE Japan and have always wanted to go to the city of Sendai just because I've heard it mentioned a couple of times in anime *coughs* Ronin Warriors *cough* and it's just not one of those main 'touristy' areas. But again please help if you can if not financially at least give something. Here in the states spring is just blossoming but it will snow over there! And I'm talking about a LOT of snow…like enough snow that a 3hr drive to Mt. Fuji from Tokyo will turn into a 15hr drive back. Personal experience right here. Alright so enough of my propaganda.

Love you all! Especially if you review and some of you have reviews just crack me up. If you really tell me how you feel, you more than make my day. LOL.


	11. Insecurities

Insecurities

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Twilight characters.**

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It just wasn't fair and in my mind there's no way of justifying it. I'm sure some people would say 'karma's a bitch' but this – this was just too much. Not only had I lost my best friend, family, friends but also my child. At first I felt as if losing the baby was my punishment for having betrayed Leah, for choosing Sam over my own flesh and blood and then making her suffer every step of the way by asking her to still be my best friend, demanding her support. But all of that was thrown out the window when faced the grim reality that Leah could've gotten pregnant all along. She wasn't sterile, infertile or even broken. She was perfectly fine – better than that even. She could heal from any wound inflicted upon her except for vampire venom meaning that no matter how angry Jacob was to get that even if he did 'accidentally' phase near her that she'd heal in a matter of hours. Her face would never bare the permanent and disfiguring scars of a protector having gone off the deep end.

Growing up she was always more popular than me, she had more friends than me and even my own friends looked forward to hanging out with her. Mom and Aunt Sue just always said, 'the squeaky wheel gets the oil' whenever I would complain about Leah being the center of attention. It's just never been fair that Leah simply received more attention because she was the most vociferous. I craved the same attention she received but I – I just didn't want to earn it the way she did by showing off by doing flips, telling some funny story about something that happened while out with my friends or – or interrupting someone while they were talking to ask some question.

Throughout our childhood Leah was always the star and after Sam it was finally my time to be in the limelight. To be the most popular and have people like me for me and not because I craved and desired their attention like some lost child. And yet, somehow, Leah has found a way to take it all away from me – again.

"I'm not even going to pretend that I understand the pain you must've felt over losing the baby." Leah says snapping me out of my thoughts. My eyes narrow for a second as I take in the sad and steady gaze that she is giving me. "It's not fair that a life was lost." She tacks on slowly shaking her head, her hands instinctively going to her stomach and rubbing over the bulge. My eyes begin to sting as Jacob pulls Leah close and places his own hand on top of hers offering some silent form of comfort.

"You always have to beat me, don't you?" I ask through clenched teeth. There's no doubt in my mind that the baby will be healthy and strong so much like its parents and so instead I focus on my own demons. I've tried to ignore these feelings but I can't – not anymore.

"Beat you? What are you talking about?" Leah asks with a surprised look upon her face. I don't know what annoys me more, the fact that she constantly beats me without even trying or the fact that she's completely oblivious to the competition between us. All siblings are competitive; she's competitive with Seth just as I am with my own sister but I can't beat her either.

"You always have to find a way to stand out more, don't you?" I ask as tears begin to well up in my eyes.

I know that life isn't fair but this seems to be just too much. My life seemed as if it was finally going right – perfectly but then Leah had to leave and join Jacob's pack, she refused to be in my wedding, offered a curt congratulations before leaving suddenly and then cut me out of her wedding altogether to Jacob Black. The whole rez seemed to bow at her feet, always praising her for her attitude, artwork and her role on the Council. There was a time when it was me that they praised for being the kind, supportive and patient wife of Sam Uley, for having to put up with Leah's nasty attitude.

"The entire rez loves you now, again." I explain as Leah stands looking at me with a confused expression upon her face.

"Say what now?" Leah asks leaning forward, her head tilting to the side as one eyebrow furrows in a look of pure and utter confusion.

"You heard me the entire rez loves you and despises me." I screech out and immediately the pack disagrees with me. Their soft words of comfort mean nothing because I know the truth. I know what others say behind my back when they think I'm not listening.

"HA!" Leah says with a loud, sharp bark of a laugh. "The entire rez does _not _love me." Leah states matter-of-factly while shaking her head. I feel my face scrunching up even more so I try to combat the next bout of tears that are threatening to fall. "Emily you can't seriously believe that everyone loves – let alone likes me." Leah asks with a half-smile that seems almost condescending despite her questioning tone.

"Of course they do. Back in July for the Quileute Days they all bought your artwork and even glared at me when you were talking about the pain you were in." I explain as hot tears begin to run down my face, along the scars of my face and to my collarbone. "They hold me and Sam responsible for that, we're the bad guys instead of the ones who tried to reach out to you and help you the most."

"You weren't trying to help me – not in the least." Leah states coldly, her eyes darkening and chest puffing out. "I just needed time away from both of you but neither of you could seem to wrap that concept around your little pea brains." Leah states with a low growl. "Look, Emily, you and Sam both hurt me. You know that, we've done this dance before." Leah says slowly shaking her head.

"I needed the time to deal with the pain and my demons on my own terms. The wound never had a chance to heal and all you and Sam kept doing was picking at it every time you two got all kissy-faced and lovey-dovey. Like I said before I don't care if y'all do that I just don't want to be around to witness it. There's only so much a girl can take and I had hit my breaking point."

"As far as the rez, most of these people are just gossipers that are desperate to know what the big 'secret' is." Leah says making air quotations and her voice elevating as if there was something mythical about our world – which there is but the entire rez didn't know about it. "These people will go with the flavor of the week. If it wasn't for Jacob here they probably wouldn't care so much about me until they realized it was my day to work at the Hall and deal with their problems of the day. So this has nothing to do with me and you." Leah says shaking her head.

"I certainly didn't blame _you_ for my sudden drop in popularity. Now Sam I will blame because once I became a wolf I had to completely cut off _all_ of my friends and you had already burned your bridge with me. I was alone and it was _my_ anger that only made it worse." Leah says surprising me with her attitude. After all this time I felt certain that she blamed and Sam wholly and solely for her fall from grace.

"But things have gotten better for me and I'm repairing a lot of relationships that were lost to me. I have better avenues to vent out my anger and frustration." Leah states with a smile but stops as Jacob clears his throat and the two of them share a look. "Okay…so maybe I still get violent every so often but it's only with these morons."

"Hopefully, that'll stop now that she's been knocked up." Paul mumbles under his breath before being shushed by Rachel.

"So if your reason for saying that life isn't fair is because you think the entire rez loves me then you need to open your eyes Emily. The entire rez doesn't love me anymore then they loved you when you first arrived." Leah says crossing her arms and uncrossing them, wincing in pain before letting her arms fall at her sides with a heavy sigh. "They've talked about everyone in this room – even my own mother because she started hanging out with Charlie for that while and even Billy because he suddenly started _trying_ to hang out with my mom instead of Charlie." Looking over I see Billy look away with a small blush on his cheeks before looking back and seeing a disgusted look on Jacob's face.

"You've always been more popular than me. People have always been more willing to stand up for you than me." I throw out weakly and Leah laughs.

"Are you serious? The family has always stood up for you more than me because you were the 'quiet one'. I was always told to tone it down whenever they felt I was doing too much when it was supposed to be your 'day'." Leah says with a roll of her eyes.

"Who's been standing up for her?" Jacob asks with a suspicious look upon his face as if he already has a culprit in mind.

"The rez bought your fry bread and Mason," I'm interrupted as Leah cries out 'fry bread' and Jacob says 'Mason' at the same time.

"When the hell did I ever sell fry…bread…wait? You mean back when we were teenagers?" Leah asks with a surprised look on her face.

"When was Mason standing up for _her_?" Jacob growls out.

"Quileute Days?" Leah asks and I nod my head. "Dear God, Emily, let's not bring that up again. I thought we settled that after you sat up crying in the back of Dad's truck about the muffins that didn't sell.

"Well everyone bought _your_ fry bread," I shout not enjoying the fact that Leah is so easily dismissing my arguments.

"I only made eight dozen but you made enough muffins to feed all of fuckin' South Africa. Nobody told you to make so many damn muffins. And Seth snuck most of the fry bread away when he thought I wasn't looking." Leah frowns as I stare at her in shock. I do remember making a lot of muffins and Leah commenting on them but only jokingly. She never mentioned that I had made too many after that and instead did her best to sell as many as she could.

I can't help but look down in shame as I begin to think over our lives together. Leah always has been the more outgoing girl between the two of us. It was never a big deal for her to walk up to someone and strike up a conversation, even if they were a perfect stranger, while I would just hang back and wait for her to make the introductions or not speak to the person at all if I was alone.

"Look, Emily, I'll agree with you that life isn't fair but your reasoning behind it is…well…stupid." Leah says with an unapologetic shrug. "At some point you gotta stop blaming the world for your troubles and start taking responsibility for your actions. It took me a while but I've finally started doing it." Leah admits and for a moment I see a glimpse of my old cousin, my best friend that always shared with me some of her most vulnerable moments. "Sometimes the hand we're dealt sucks but all you can do is work with what you got until something better comes along." As she says it, she turns and smiles up at Jacob who leans down and kisses her on the lips lightly.

"We all have our issues and insecurities because believe me I was cornering the market in them but most times they are just what's in our head. The entire rez doesn't hate you anymore then they hated me when this whole wolf-vampire bullshit started. I'm not in competition with you for anything so you can quit thinking that I'm trying to one up you. And William Mason is an asshole who is just always looking to get under someone else's skin. He finds any reason whatsoever to claim that someone isn't 'red' enough. He's even told me the same thing because I cut off my hair." Leah says and Jacob growls darkly thinking of the man mentioned.

"Look, I'm sorry that this announcement was sprung up on ya but I had hoped that your _husband_ was paying attention to me when I was talking and would've said something." Leah says glaring darkly at Sam. I can't help but turn and look at him in hurt wonder because he knew but never said anything? "Don't feel that you have to be like ecstatic or over-the-moon for me because I'm sure that this will just be a reminder of what you've lost."

I can only slowly nod my head because truth is…I am happy for my cousin, happy that she's in love with someone that isn't my Sam, smiles more and is having a baby. It just stings recalling on how much I've missed out on since that accident.

"So I leave it up to you when you're ready to actually face the whole change. I'm not going to rush you, push your or even gripe about you not being here because in a way I understand." Leah says slowly nodding her head. I nod back in response as well and before I know it I find myself wrapped up in a tight and yet awkward hug from Leah Black. "Okay…and that's the extent of my…touching." Leah says with a look of disgust as she pulls back and looks down at the space in between us. Her boobs are practically spilling out of her shirt and I can tell that she's leaning forward at an awkward angle because of not only her height but her belly as well.

I can't help but laugh at her as I take a step back and listen to her grumble about how fat she is and feels.

I don't leave as I had originally intended to do but stick around for the rest of the meeting that thankfully doesn't remain centered on Leah's pregnancy. During the evening I manage to catch Sue alone and ask her about the lecture that Leah served me and Sue can only smile at me stating that each of the Elders sat her and Jacob both down and had a serious talking to. That it did take a while but eventually Leah got over her issues, hurt feelings and found herself and that it was Billy's talk about taking responsibility that caused her to leave and head for south of the border over a year ago. Leah was following down the same road as Sam and blaming the imprint for her actions and that she needed to be reminded that she had been told the same thing for a long time. The imprint was rare and seemed to have been weakening the older E.J. got and even at the wedding he was more than happy to see Leah marrying someone that she genuinely loved despite all of their faults.

Looking over at my cousin I see that she has truly grown up into a wonderful and strong woman; that it's the trials and the heartaches that she learned to deal with that have transformed her from that young girl that felt like she was invincible to a woman that is more careful and visibly aware of the world around her. She doesn't seek out the approval of everyone around her but seeks it first from within and then from those closest to her. Even though I am the oldest out of the two of us it's amazing how even after all that we've been through I can still look up and admire her. And even though Leah said there was no competition between us I'm going to try to be just as strong as she is. Rome wasn't built in a day and I'm sure that in a few weeks that I'll be hit with another bout of jealousy and envy for the life that she's living but no doubt she'll give me another taste of reality.

So in the meantime I'll make sure that I can forgive myself for hurting Leah instead of placing the blame elsewhere.

* * *

A/N: Alright, so I am going to officially call this story complete because there's a Blackwater with kids story in the making and I don't want use up all of my ideas on this one. Woohoo! This story is complete! My laptop hasn't frozen up on me and I seem to be on a roll…but let's see if I can still keep this up after laying some Turf Builder down in the yard. -_-; It should be fun…and shouldn't take me long to treat 2/3 of an acre of land. *groans* Happy 4th of July to the Americans and Happy Territory Day to my Aussies! WOOHOO!


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